Sticker Shock

These bumper stickers were being sold at the Conservative Political Action Conference. (David S. Holloway -- For The Washington Post)

At the Conservative Political Action Conference, which featured Vice President Cheney as its opening luncheon speaker yesterday, one of the various exhibition booths hawking paraphernalia had some virulently anti-Muslim vinyl bumper stickers, for $3.95, including one that said: "No Muslims -- No Terrorism."

Sources said an attendee at the group's 30th annual conference, at the Crystal City Marriott, called Cheney's office to complain and a Cheney aide called CPAC organizers to express "strong displeasure."

The booth operators removed the anti-Muslim stickers from the rack before Cheney spoke -- though they left up some more tasteful items, such as the stamps that said: "WANTED! Crimes against children," and had a picture of former attorney general Janet Reno, "A.K.A. 'The Butcher of Waco.' " And they left others supporting the Confederate flag and such.

But the offending stickers were not really taken off sale. When a Washington Post reporter asked about the anti-Muslim bumper stickers, a booth attendant smiled and reached behind a sheet, saying conference organizers had ordered her to take them off display.

"Somebody doesn't believe in free speech," she complained, offering them for $2.75 apiece.

Talk about going off-message!

The PPT Priority

There may be deficits as far as the eye can see and too little money for domestic spending needs. There's not even, as Sen. Robert C. Byrd (D-W.Va.) and others have noted, enough money around for vital homeland security programs.

But that didn't stop the Senate last week from officially funding, for the first time, an office called the President Pro Tempore Emeritus, or, as insiders say, the PPTE. After all, the Founding Fathers themselves set up the constitutionally mandated office of president pro tempore of the Senate.

That job is usually given to the most senior senator in the majority. The PPT's function, such as it is, is to sign bills and preside over the Senate when the vice president is in an undisclosed location or otherwise busy. (It could be that, in creating this office, the Framers were trying to show they were not infallible.) Well, if the Framers thought a PPT was important, surely the country could use an ex-PPT. So when the Democrats took over the Senate in 2001, Sen. Strom Thurmond (R-S.C.) was declared America's first PPTE. To go along with this important position, Thurmond informally got office space and money through a Senate contingency fund.

But an amendment to the appropriations bill that passed the Senate last week -- without objection by any senator -- officially funds the office of the PPTE with $150,000 for staff and $7,500 for office expenses and such.

Last week's amendment was introduced by Byrd, who, of course, happens to be the PPTE in the GOP-controlled Senate. Well, at least the office won't be in West Virginia.

Digging for Dirt

Fire in the hole! Looks like things are about to get very ugly at the Mine Safety and Health Administration. Some officials there are said to be in a state of panic, scurrying for lawyers after the Labor Department inspector general's office conducted simultaneous raids Tuesday on offices in Arlington; Lakewood, Colo.; and Beckley, W. Va.

The investigators interviewed employees about contracting matters and credit card use, according to Mine Safety and Health News. The investigation itself, which also includes allegations of nepotism and computer security, was not atypical.

But it is most unusual indeed for the IG not to announce reviews beforehand. So unusual that Assistant IG Elliot P. Lewis wrote Dave Lauriski, the assistant secretary for MSHA, to explain why the surprise raids.

It was felt necessary, Lewis wrote, "due to the sensitivity of the issues involved in this matter, along with allegations of prior document-shredding by MSHA employees, we have decided not to provide advance notification." Sounds like a good idea. "Further, the information we have received does not preclude the possibility of potential criminal violations."

If you've got a phone . . .

Close Enough?

It's hard to keep those "I" countries straight. Even President Bush can get tripped up over that. Speaking yesterday about his pal Saddam Hussein, Bush said: "And should he choose to leave the country, along with a lot of the other henchmen who have tortured the Iranian -- Iraqi people, we would welcome that, of course."

Can't figure out his problem. It's really not that hard. It's Iraq now. Iran next year.

On the other hand, Hussein tortured Iranian people, too.