A new site is offering to take the guesswork out of your next tweet by taking past updates and mashing them into one garbled, 140-character masterpiece.
Let’s be real: It doesn’t take an in-depth creative process to dream up a tweet, but the nonsense cobbled together by the ”That can be my next tweet!” generator is endlessly entertaining.
For me, it was a lot like reading what I’d be tweeting if I were suddenly caught sleepwalking. That’s when things started to get fun.
My theory is that this generator captures the subliminal. Just imagine the following as R.E.M.-state mumblings, and I’m sure you’d agree. Behold, tweets from your friendly Post social media team, some politicians and a handful of celebrities.
This sounds a bit like how I’d like to spend a Sunday in an alternate universe:
And here’s an update from BlogPostess Melissa, whose boundless ethusiasm for both Caps Lock and exclamation points was clearly captured by this magic generator:
Okay, so maybe the Washington Post couldn’t really talk in its sleep, but if the walls here could talk, this is along the lines of what they’d say:
Here are updates from Nancy Pelosi and Sarah Palin, two women of diametrically opposing viewpoints but whose future tweets both sound like the same sort of spam ad you’d see on the side of your Facebook page:
Since I’m fairly certain he’s a cyborg of some sort, for me, this wordless, error-message-like tweet from Most Powerful Moppet in the World Justin Bieber says it all. Robots don’t talk in their sleep:
The next two tweets, from a Kardashian and a Kanye, don’t really need an introduction. (Note: They’re best visualized as mumbled in a Grey Goose-induced haze.)
And then there’s good old Charlie Sheen, whose future tweet is actually a step toward coherency compared to what we’re used to seeing:
Like a Dinosaur Stampede from middle earth RAGING atop Col. Kilgore's main rotor, our assault must be EPIC. The Truth is our rocket fuel. c