“Magic Mike” — the movie about male strippers that was directed by Steven Soderbergh and therefore gives us the rare opportunity to objectify men while pretending we’re discussing a work of cinematic art — premiered Sunday night during the Los Angeles Film Festival.
Unfortunately, everyone showed up at the premiere fully clothed, which just seems like a missed opportunity. (Couldn’t someone at least have tried to talk Channing Tatum into streaking on the red carpet? I mean, sheesh.)
Here are a few photos from the premiere. Again, we offer these images purely because they represent the people involved in making what I am certain will be the most nuanced film of 2012 to feature Matthew McConaughey in a thong.
Here’s Matthew Bomer (clothed) at the premiere.
Here’s Bomer (still clothed) from another angle...
...and here he is from yet another angle. Wait, what? I’m a professional, objective journalist who is supposed to portray multiple aspects of an event? Oh, uh, right. I knew that. That’s why I’ve followed up with a photo of McConaughey with his wife Camila McConaughey (formerly Alves).
They also are both clothed.
Hey, look, it’s the Wonder Twins of Male Stripper Movies, Steven Soderbergh and Tatum. (Both clothed in nearly identical ensembles.)
Here’s Joe Manganiello, totally not-naked, but displaying major hunk face.
Olivia Munn, who also appears in the film, kept her clothes on.
Cody Horn did, too.
As did a very happy Alex Pettyfer, who at least threw us a bone by stripping away his facial hair.
Manganiello, McConaughey and Tatum may have been discussing a potential red carpet strip-off when this photo was taken. Or, more likely, McConaughey was asking his co-stars why he was the only dude who bothered to show up in a tux.
Still, maybe it was a good thing that everyone kept their apparel in its appropriate place at the “Magic Mike” premiere. A lot of people came to the event that are not in the movie and don’t possess the necessary level of strip-teasing experience. And we wouldn’t want such individuals to feel obligated to shed the blazers and shirts off their backs in such a public manner.