"Jersey Shore" is far more important than any of us realized. Unlike MTV's slowly ossifying "Real World" series or even the over-scripted melodrama of Bravo's "Real Housewives" franchise, "Jersey Shore" is genuine. Or as genuine as a show about men with fake tans and women with hair extensions (and their own fake tans) can be.
The show is, as they say, a phenomenon. With season 2 underway and filming of season 3 already wrapped, it would seem that Nicole "Snooki" Polizzi, Jenni "J-WOWW" Farley, "DJ Pauly D" DelVecchio, Vinny Guadagnino, Ronnie Ortiz-Magro, Sammi "Sweetheart" Giancola, Angelina Pivarnick and Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino have successfully made the leap from cable obscurity to full-on pop culture street cred. For proof, look no further than ABC, where "The Situation" continues to hold on to his "Dancing With the Stars" berth alongside the likes of Jennifer Grey and Bristol Palin.
This unlikely band of vapid 20-somethings has arrived. And with them, they've brought an entirely new vocabulary. After the jump, we define the most important "Jersey Shore"-isms. Print the list and keep it handy when viewing tonight's episode (10 p.m. ET on MTV).
A "Jersey Shore" Glossary:
Creepin': This describes the male cast members' attempts to hook up with chicks who are DTF (see below).
Dirty Little Hamster: Just one of Mike "The Situation" Sorrentino's nicknames for much-maligned (and rightly so) roommate Angelina.
DTF: Down to [rhymes with cluck].
Gorilla juice head: An overly-pumped, tanned habitué of the Jersey Shore, prone to wearing blingy T-shirts and much sought after by Snooki.
Grenade: The guys use this term for girls they consider less than attractive when "creepin'" at the club. (Also see "Landmine" below.)
GFF: Short for "Grenade Free Foundation," of which MVP (see below) and Ronnie are all members.
GTL: Gym, tan, laundry. Basically the three activities the male cast members spend most of their time on when not creepin' (see above) or smooshing (see below).
Here, the boys explain GTL:
Landmine: A variation of the grenade (see above), a landmine apparently weighs more than a typical grenade.
MVP: Mike, Vinny, Paulie. Apparently they have some kind of Axe Body Spray-generated superpower when they hit the clubs together.
Smoosh/Smash: The act that occurs when one of the cast members finds a gorilla or non-grenade who is DTF (see above). There is a dedicated smoosh/smash room in the house. Just eww.
Staten Island Ferry/Staten Island Dump: More nicknames for Angelina, who does in fact hail from Staten Island. The first iteration is usually followed by the punch line "everybody gets a ride and its free."
T-shirt time: MVP (see above) and Ronnie start chanting this inane little jingle around 11 p.m. most nights when it is time to change out of their black wife-beaters and into their douchy club gear: blingy T-shirts and tight jeans.
Trashbag: Yet another one of "The Situation's" nicknames for Angelina.
Did I leave anything out? Add in the comments section below...