Congratulations! You made it through Valentine’s Day. Did you spend it basking in the glow of the one you love? Celebrating your decision not to acknowledge it? Smarting from all the stress of planning the perfect night? Perhaps thinking about your crushing loneliness?
Whatever your plans were, I think we can all agree that “Muppets” man Jason Segel spent his Valentine’s Day evening the right way.
I just crushed potato chips on top of a pepperoni and sausage pizza alone in bed watching Secretariat. Happy Valentine's day.— Jason Segel (@jasonsegel) February 15, 2012
Happy Valentine's Day everyone. I wish we were together. But I promise, I'm not going out with anyone else. twitter.com/jasonsegel/sta…— Jason Segel (@jasonsegel) February 14, 2012
Yeah, that sounds pretty awesome. But, dear Jason, let’s not forget the picture you shared with David Letterman last year. You know, the one where you’re passed out on a bed with Taco Bell on your chest? The one that prompted you to lose 30 pounds because it was so upsetting? It’s a slippery slope.
Taking a cue from Segel, read more not-so-traditional Valentine’s Day tweets (see: no kissing pictures!) shared by celebrities below.
Did anyone else wake up this Valentine's Day & send a mass text to find standup spots? #StandupisMyOnlyTrueLove— Aziz Ansari (@azizansari) February 14, 2012
Don't forget to give your Valentine a real hearty handshake today!— Steve Martin (@SteveMartinToGo) February 15, 2012
Happy VALentine's Day, @ValEKilmer! Get it? Seriously though, big fan.— rob delaney (@robdelaney) February 14, 2012
What's that one Valentine's Day tradition called where you sit in silence and watch Criminal Minds?— billy eichner (@billyeichner) February 15, 2012
If you're single on Valentine's Day, see a couple holding hands, run through the middle & yell, "I'VE BROKEN THE SPELL! BE FREE!"— Dane Cook (@danecook) February 14, 2012
In honor of Valentine's Day, I'm having a small chicken burrito and an apple. Start your sex engines! bit.ly/zPc5u6— Conan O'Brien (@ConanOBrien) February 14, 2012
Happy Valentine's Day everyone. If you have someone special, give them a kiss. If you don't, make a voodoo doll of your ex and cast spells.— Lady Gaga (@ladygaga) February 14, 2012
Happy Valentine's Day! Hope you're enjoying your flowers, or chocolates, or smug self-satisfaction at not celebrating Valentine's Day.— Stephen Colbert (@StephenAtHome) February 15, 2012