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Posted at 04:48 PM ET, 05/16/2012

Mary J. Blige turns ‘Any Way You Want It’ into a strip club tutorial for ‘Rock of Ages’ (Video)

Julianne Hough and Diego Boneta in a scene (at a Tower Records, remember those?) from “Rock of Ages.” (David James)
As the release date for “Rock of Ages” approaches and we continue to mentally prepare for its high-octane level of ’80s-ness, a new clip has arrived online to assist with the process.

It’s a video for the Mary J. Blige-crooned cover of Journey’s “Any Way You Want It” (found via Movieline) and it has made me see this song in a very different light. (At this point, I should note that I have not seen the play “Rock of Ages,” and I realize that’s a criminal offense given my lifelong allegiance to the MTV decade, but there’s not much I can do about it this second, so just let it go.)

Anyway, the song. As you can see below, what “Rock of Ages” teaches us is that this Journey classic is actually about maintaining customer satisfaction at a strip club. Add this to the list of life lessons “Rock of Ages” will undoubtedly impart.

Seriously, did anyone tell Steve Perry that when he sang about how “she loves to move, she loves to groove,” he was actually talking about a stripper named Sapphire?

Because based on the original music video, I thought this track was about a dude trying to select a song to play on a jukebox that contained nothing but Journey songs.

And based on “Caddyshack,” I thought it was about firing up a party on a golf course and really ticking off Ted Knight.

And based on this commercial, I thought it was about State Farm insurance, or at least about Journey collecting yet another fat paycheck:

But actually, it’s just about being a stripper. “Rock of Ages”: is there anything it can’t teach us?

By  |  04:48 PM ET, 05/16/2012

Categories:  Movies

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