(Watch video after the jump)
Some people are incredibly talented improvisers. Robert Pattinson is not one of those people.
Consequently, Pattinson followed fellow presenter Patrick Dempsey’s smooth tribute to Witherspoon by unfolding some crumpled paper with notes on it and delivering an epic series of remarks. (Dude, FYI: this is not a rehearsal dinner in the private room at the Olive Garden.)
The most beloved vampire in America proceeded to bust on Witherspoon for cutting him out of their first movie together (“Vanity Fair”), point out that in “Water for Elephants” he [bleeped] her (that was the f-bomb part), suggest that she wears a girdle and doesn’t talk about it, accuse her of drinking too much tequila and imply that she knows something about being 33 percent lesbian.
“This is the worst,” fellow presenter Chelsea Handler declared, before Pattinson finally pulled himself together and began his speech. No, Chelsea. What happened later was the worst, yet also decidedly amusing.
(The clip, and more, after the jump.)
Not to be overshadowed, Witherspoon accepted her award, dropped a couple of bleeped f-words of her own and made one comment in particular that played like a less than subtle pot shot at alleged nude self-portrait snapper Blake Lively.
“It’s also possible to make it in Hollywood without a reality show,” she said. “When I came up in this business, when you made a sex tape you were embarrassed and you hid it under your bed. If you take naked pictures of yourself on your cell phone, you hide your face, people. Hide your face.”
As far as Pattinson’s behavior, the only thing that explains it is the fact that he was still thrown by kissing Taylor Lautner earlier in the evening. Yes, you can watch that classic orchestrated-by-MTV moment below.