The wedding of Miley Cyrus and Liam Hemsworth may be imminent, according to the Internet. The Internet thinks this might be true, maybe, because of a vague tweet Cyrus shared on Sunday that could mean, at last estimate, 897 different things.
“Super lazy Sunday! Can’t wait for next week! It’ll be filled with happiness =],”Cyrus wrote on the social media site.
That prompted Perez Hilton to ask, “Are Miley Cyrus and Liam Hemsworth getting married NEXT weekend?”
And People to note that “Cyrus didn't say whether she plans on tying the knot in the next few days, which leaves the source of her ‘happiness’ up for discussion (much like the style of her wedding dress).” The magazine also pointed out that Hemsworth’s rep, via Gossip Cop, has denied that the ceremony is imminent.
Meanwhile, Hollywood Life focused on a different Sunday tweet, one in which the singer-actress said she was “mentally exhausted” and getting into bed with a copy of the last installment of “50 Shades of Grey.”
“Do you think she’s just stressed out with planning her big day?” the blog asked.
I am surprised no one has made more of that “50 Shades of Grey” reference, which — like clashing with a photographer on your way to obtain a marriage license — is a traditional indication that a celebrity wedding is quickly approaching.
My theory, at this juncture, is that Cyrus is just super-excited about seeing “The Amazing Spider-Man” on July 3. (Back-up theory: In an unprecedented celebrity wedding conspiracy, she’s distracting us from the fact that Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are the ones actually getting married next weekend. Back-up to the back-up theory: She’s just bein’ Miley.)
Either way, the beauty of all this “we think she’s getting married but she might not be” speculation can be summed up in this passage from a piece of A.A. Milne’s “Winnie the Pooh” poetry.
“So Pooh and I go whispering, and Pooh looks very bright,
And says, ‘Well, I say sixpence, but I don't suppose I'm right.’
And then it doesn't matter what the answer ought to be,
'Cos if he's right, I'm Right, and if he's wrong, it isn't Me.”
In other words, if the couple does get married in the coming days, the blogosphere can say, “Told you so.” And if they don’t, the blogosphere can also still say, “Told you so.” The Internet is so magical that way.