First came the news that a musical based on the movie “Diner” would be made, with music by Sheryl Crow. Now it appears that the musical version of “National Lampoon’s Animal House” is happening, with a score by the Barenaked Ladies.
That sounds like a joke. But per this item from the New York Times, it is not.
Universal Pictures Stage Production announced today that it is developing a stage production based on the exploits of those randy Delta Tau Chi boys, with Casey Nicholaw — a Tony Award winner for his work on “The Book of Mormon” — slated to direct. In order to maximize the potential for John Belushi to roll over in his grave, the news was disseminated on the 30th anniversary of the death of the comic legend/food fight instigator.
In fairness, given the pedigree behind it, this has the potential to be a cheeky, potentially fun song-and-dance show, especially if someone is smart enough to park some kegs in the back of the theater during each performance. But it has to be handled just right, otherwise this could be the worst idea since ... well, since pretty much every other Broadway adaptation of a beloved motion picture that focuses on characters who would never, in 85,000 years, go see a Broadway musical.
Presumably the members of the Barenaked Ladies are already hard at work coming up with song ideas, or at least trying to get the rights to use “Louie, Louie.” In an effort to assist their efforts, here’s a list of some potential musical number titles for the “Animal House” show. We welcome further suggestions in the comments section.
Hopefully the Ladies will find these useful tips, even though they totally didn’t listen to us when we offered really solid lyric ideas for “One Week” (“Hot like wasabi when I bust rhymes/Big like street mimes” — come on, that’s better than LeeAnn Rimes. At least they’re two different words!)
Potential titles for the musical numbers in the “National Lampoon’s Animal House” show:
1. “The Ballad of Flounder.”
2. “Master of the (Frat) House.”
3. “It’s Time to Toga ... To-ga!”
4. “Double Secret — I Said, Hush! Hush! — Probation.”
5. “I Gave My Love a Cherry” (Note: This number will last 25 seconds, at which point Bluto will break a guitar and the whole thing will come to a screeching halt.)
6. “Food Fight, Glorious Food Fight (I’m a Zit, Get It?)” as well as “Food Fight, Glorious Food Fight (I’m a Zit, Get It?): Reprise.”
7. “The Worthless and the Weak.” (Performed by Niedermeyer)
8. “Hopelessly Devoted to Fawn Liebowitz.”
9. “Stop the Room From Spinning, I Want to Get Off Before I Vomit on Dean Wormer. ”
10. “Tough Get Going (Forget It, He’s Rolling).”
Bonus suggestion: “Knights and Day,” a tribute to roadhouse band Otis Day and the Knights, which obviously will be scrapped entirely if the rights to “Shout” and “Shama Lama Ding Dong” can be obtained. Actually, the entire second act may be scrapped if the rights to those two songs are acquired.