Presented without comment is this interview.

That is really all you can do with a Kevin Curtis interview, present it without comment. The charges against him for mailing ricin to President Obama have been dropped, which I’m sure comes as a relief to the worldwide community of Elvis impersonators, of which Curtis is a member.

I am not sure what the status of his dog Moocow is. I do not think Curtis is clear on the status of Moocow. Curtis also mentions the dog in his Piers Morgan interview. Moocow was startled by homeland security agents, has been lost and was found again? It is hard to say. (“I bought a fish a week before–” Curtis also noted, before being cut off.) Also, Curtis missed his son’s appearance onstage as a bumblebee when he was 9 years old? He has been to jail 20 times? But never convicted of anything? Something about a band Robodrum? Waitresses? Jungles?

He is awhirl in mystery. Even Piers Morgan got lost.

He is also a “licensed reflexologist” who wants to repay the community with hours of free foot massages.  (“I have contempt for rice,” Curtis notes, after his run-in with ricin.)

There are still many unanswered questions. In fact, I have more questions than answers. What is the status of Moocow? What about that fish?

All in all, well done, America. This was a rough week for the Elvis impersonator community, and I am glad that it has emerged without a scratch on its escutcheon. Some communities go through enough grief on a regular basis without suspected poisoners being added to their midst, and Elvis impersonators are one of them, especially when you take into account the fat jumpsuited years. I’m glad this particular case has been put to rest.

Maybe he will get some gigs out of this. After all, embedded in all the articles about his alleged crimes came the ringing endorsement from Sen. Roger Wicker, who hired him as a Elvis impersonator one time and commented that “he was very entertaining.” If his interviews so far are any indication, that’s surely true.

Alexandra Petri writes the ComPost blog, offering a lighter take on the news and opinions of the day.