Hillary Clinton is finally on Twitter.
Be prepared for another several years of attempts to gin up exciting will-she-won’t-she tension. Already, her bio is enough to fuel the fire of People Who Spend Their Days Gazing Intently At 2016. “Wife, mom, lawyer, women & kids advocate, FLOAR, FLOTUS, US Senator, SecState, author, dog owner, hair icon, pantsuit aficionado, glass ceiling cracker, TBD…” You had me, Hillary, until the “TBD…” The First Lady doth protest too much, methinks.
Can we just skip this?
Don’t get me wrong, I like the bio she’s chosen. I’d forgotten all about FLOAR, and it’s a fun acronym. It sounds like something the Internet yells.
But there’s a certain point in any show where the will-they-won’t-they tension become absolutely unbearable, and that point was sometime in 2006. If Hillary Clinton and Running for President were a will-they-won’t-they central couple on a TV show, they would already have had a baby (in 2008 sometime) and one of them would have had to contract a mysterious tropical illness to add interest to the narrative at this point. It’s already jumped the shark, never mind their efforts to convince us that 2008 was like the part in Season 4 of Bones where Bones and Booth finally get it on but it doesn’t count because he’s having a dream in a coma, or something.
Can we just go ahead and start running? What is the worst that can happen? Hillary doesn’t win? That’s happened already. Otherwise, these “TBD…” moments and this nebulous book project slowly crawling towards us out of the mist seem like when a guy telephones you six times after midnight to reiterate that he is not interested.
I know there is a long and proud tradition of people Asking To Be Recruited By Wild Popular Acclaim. George Washington mysteriously turned up in uniform at the Second Continental Congress just when it was time to decide who would lead the fledgling American army. But if this is being coy, I’d hate to see what being overt looks like.
And welcome to Twitter.