“It’s a samurai!” the P.A. announcer said at Nats Park on Wednesday night, as a samurai emerged from the right field corner and began taking out giant racing presidents.
The surviving giant racing presidents kept going, headed toward a finish line held by Redskins linebacker Rocky McIntosh and world-famous gymnast Dominique Dawes.
Weird, no? And you know what? That still wasn’t as weird as what happened on the field. I mean, it’s late June and these Nats are .500 and in legitimate wild-card contention. Sort-of strangers are coming up to me and wanting to talk about Washington’s baseball team. You could populate the Presidents Race with three slices of talking watermelon, a grumpy kangaroo from Prague, an obstacle course made of broken yellow exploding laptops and coucous smoothies, plus Rex Grossman and John Beck, and I’d still be like, pshaw, that’s nothing, did you see what the team just did?
Plus, look to your right, at that little box with the top five most popular WaPo sports links. Odds are, at least two of them are about the Nats. The Nats. The Rapture is here, after all. I mean, Adam Kilgore has started going with Juggernats, and that works for me.
(And yes, I realize it was U.S.-Japan Night or something like that. Still, a samurai taking out a giant racing Thomas Jefferson? That doesn’t happen on every U.S. Japan Night. And I’m pretty sure neither McIntosh nor Dawes is Japanese.)