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Posted at 03:24 PM ET, 05/31/2012

FedEx Field, the Redskins and 12th Man signs


Like you, perhaps, I recently learned that the future of American democracy — and indeed, all of Western Civilization — might be in question if a sporting entity other than Texas A&M makes reference to a 12th Man.

I quoted Reader Loyd in my previous post, but I have to do so again right here, because this is important:

As it stands right now, Americans are still allowed to own personal property. Let say that you own a car that you keep parked outside your residence. If you went to travel somewhere in your car, but went outside to find it missing, you would report it stolen, wouldn’t you? That is because the use of someone/something’s property without permission is illegal. Or do you not care if random people borrow your car without your permission?

I mean, hell no I don’t want random people borrowing my car without permission.

They might find that I’ve literally been driving around with basically every piece of dry cleaning I own in my trunk for a week, not to mention a Comcast cable box, a John Deere hat from Iowa, my daughter’s too-small Skuut Bike, and like 45 half-eaten packages of sunflower seeds. Next thing you know, these car-borrowers would probably be eating parts of my face off.

Plus, my car is my personal property. Rule of law. Private ownership of goods. City on the Hill. Locke’s Second Treatise. “The labour of his body, and the work of his hands, we may say, are properly his.” All that.

Thus, it has recently come to my attention that a local sports team stole Texas A&M’s car more than three years ago, at least. Then this team parked that stolen car in public, in a place where something like 550,000 people could see it each year, while also fishing every dirty soda-stained penny out of the cup holders. And no one has yet reported the crime.

Does no one care about this? Have we all become so inured to creeping socialism and widespread intellectual theft that such a brazen, civilization-weakening disaster could sit in public for more than a thousand days, thumbing its two-dimensional burgundy-hued nose at the blind, unseeing, Bakunin-obsessed masses below?

I mean, yo, Texas A&M. The Redskins are stealing your stuff. Get on it. The future of the American legal system might rest in the balance.

(Photos taken Wednesday night by @primetimereds and @plantmike.)


By  |  03:24 PM ET, 05/31/2012

Categories:  D.C. United | Tags:  Redskins;FedEx Field;12th man

 
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