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Posted at 04:51 PM ET, 03/01/2009

Local Hoops Gets Testy

Having missed massively important news concerning all five local pro teams, I'll just go ahead and move on to week-old college basketball jokes. Bear in mind that these are last week's rankings, and that I do this so that the hard work of my voters doesn't disappear for all time.

Anyhow, lots of ill will running around the Atlantic 11 scene this week.

* Terps fans feel testy toward The Post. (See the comments in today's Under Armour story.)

* Tech fans feel testy toward Duke, and refs, and whistles. (Video above via Storming the Floor)

* VCU fans feel (a bit) testy toward their student fans. (See the Zone, where attendance is noted.)

* And Bog friend and A-11 voter Matt Bonesteel feels testy toward the Washington Times's Patrick Stevens, after seeing a recent Page 2 layout at the rival shop that featured both the Delmarva/D.C. Top 10 rankings, and a blog excerpt about mohawks. To be fair, Patrick--a voter in the A-11 since its inception--told me this fall that he was starting the Delmarva/D.C. rankings on his blog. And also, it's a completely, totally different concept. He includes Delaware in his rankings.

1. Maryland

There are now so many people standing behind Gary, he looks like he's in a Verizon commercial. (John Albers)

Obama will now seek to stimulate the economy by injecting it with Grievis Vasquez. (Tim Lemke)

Kathy Worthington's ballot is thrown out again, for leaving Maryland off. (Ben Shlesinger)

The only question remaining is, do we call the reality show "Greivis Hearts Gary" or "Gary Hearts Grevis?" Maybe a fancy spinning logo, where the two names are constantly interchanged. (Bill Fitzgerald)

The only thing more predictable than a late-season Terrapin upset over North Carolina was Madea going to jail. (Jarrett Carter)

Roy Williams preparing for the inevitable "why is Morgan State more talented than North Carolina?" chain of reasoning. (Matt Holohan)

Gary thumbs his nose at The Post by beating UNC. Patrick Stevens of the Washington Times thumbs his nose at The Post by completely ripping off Steinberg. Gary 1, Patrick Stevens 0. (Matt Bonesteel)

2. VCU

The silver lining to VCU's losing to Nevada-Reno last weekend was that usually losing in Reno involves some combination of bankruptcy, embarrassment, and an STD. (Markus Videnieks)

Couldn't catch up to Nevada in the last 28 seconds, which is weird because it's hard to go to Reno without catching something. (Jack Lambert)

According to Larry Sanders, Rams coach Anthony Grant says, "the two most overrated things in life are sleeping and eating." Atlantic 11 voters beg to differ. (John Albers)

We're going to look past that loss to Nevada. Ripping off Steinberg, not so much. (Matt Bonesteel)

3. Virginia Tech

Hokies join the ranks of the few, the proud, the teams that have lost to Virginia. (Scott Allen)

Steinberg is bald. Seth Greenberg is bald. If Patrick Stevens of the Washington Times shaves his head, well that's just sad. (Matt Bonesteel)

4. American

Do Eagles move to No. 1 if they're the only Tournament team? (Swengali)

Mad props for sparing all of us from the "Holy Cross takes Patriot League lead" article you just know the Sports Guy was dying to write. OK, so he probably wasn't going to write it, but I do enjoy thinking he is, at a minimum, slightly bummed out. (Jake Leffler)

From atop the Patriot League standings, the Eagles are king of all they can see, like Yertle the Turtle, and you know how that turned out. (Bill Fitzgerald)

Several recent wins were a bit disjointed, as Diane Rehm and Ed Walker stopped the games every 10 minutes for WAMU's winter fundraising drive. (Markus Videnieks)

While Garrison Carr is having an amazing season, Tenleytown is buzzing about his heavily recruited younger brother, Nas. (Christopher Ring)

The Eagles don't have much competition in the Patriot League. Neither does The Post, whose competition locally is Patrick Stevens and the Washington Times, the newspaper equivalent of Lafayette. (Matt Bonesteel)

5. George Mason

After the election of a man as Homecoming Queen, the Patriots' season has taken a Shakespearean turn; might be time for Larranaga to dust off his St. Crispin's Day speech. (Bill Fitzgerald)

In keeping with the school's progressive image, head coach Jim Larranaga is expected to name a female student the team's Sixth Man of the Year at the Patriots' postseason banquet. (Scott Allen)

If a drag queen can be named Miss Mason, there's no reason Larranaga can't don a dress and be Cinderella again. (Ben Shlesinger)

Despite losing last weekend, Mason held Creighton's P'Allen Stinnett to a p'thetic p'rformance and only five p'oints. (Markus Videnieks)

The Patriots need to get their season together before it is too late. Jai Lewis isn't walking through that door. That door isn't nearly wide enough. (John Albers)

According to the Patriots' website, Coach Larranaga recently tipped off the Ticket to Reading Rewards program at local elementary schools. They start with "The Way of All Flesh: A Series of Interviews between Gunston and Jai Lewis." (Jack Lambert)

The final score of Mason's recent 49 - 48 over Drexel only shows that the Patriots are too explosive for the Big 10. (Chris Bocquet)

I wanted to vote them No. 1, just to catch Patrick Stevens of the Washington Times in a trap. (Matt Bonesteel)

6. Georgetown

After Patrick Ewing's videotaped message failed to inspire the Hoyas at home, JTIII plans to invite Allen Iverson to talk to his players about the virtues of practice. (Scott Allen)

What is G? It's the emblem of a warrior. It's the swagger of an athlete, a champion, and a dynasty. I don't they think deserve G. So go eorgetown! (Eric Holmberg)

Still has a chance for the prestigious 9th spot in the Big East tourney. (Kevin O'Connor)

Does anybody else sense that a significant portion of the NIT field will consist of teams from the Atlantic 11? (Sean McLernon)

I'm not sure what is more surprising: Georgetown's utter collapse or Patrick Stevens of the Washington Times ripping off Steinberg. Oh wait, now that I think about it, Patrick Stevens of the Washington Times ripping off Steinberg isn't all that surprising. (Matt Bonesteel)

7. Old Dominion

I hear Patrick Stevens of the Washington Times is growing a proud, strong moustache to emulate Monarchs Coach Blaine Taylor. STOP RIPPING OFF ATLANTIC 11 VOTER DAVE LARIMER, PATRICK STEVENS OF THE WASHINGTON TIMES. (Matt Bonesteel)

8. VMI

If only Chavis and Travis Holmes could play defense as well as they finish each other's sentences. (Scott Allen)

No. [8] in this poll, just like Patrick Stevens of the Washington Times is No. [8] in the poll of Local News Outlets That Cover College Basketball. Yeah, you're behind Larry Michael. (Matt Bonesteel)

9. Morgan State

It's like "Of Mice and Men" with the Bears being George and Lenny being Pat Kennedy's coaching career. (Jack Lambert)

Beat Maryland, which beat UNC, which beat Notre Dame, which beat Louisville, which beat No. Pitt. (Markus Videnieks)

Using the transitive property, I fully believe that Morgan State is the best team in the country. (Jamie Jones)

Reggie Holmes wants you to know that he can take both Travis and Chavis and any other Holmes you got lying around out there, including Sherlock, Larry and Santonio. (Bill Fitzgerald)

Patrick Stevens of the Washington Times, for some reason, includes Delaware State in his poll. Todd Bozeman is gonna kick your ass. (Matt Bonesteel)

10. Radford

George Mason has reportedly offered up Gunston, while Maryland is shopping a year's supply of red cups and ping-pong balls, in exchange for a few of the Highlanders' road wins. (Scott Allen)

They can't be good;they lost to W&M. (Chris Stratton)

After he dominated VMI, Art Parakhouski is now my third favorite Art, just behind Deco and Garfunkel. (Eric Angevine)

I don't know much about Radford, other than it's in first in the Big South. Here's what I know about Patrick Stevens of the Washington Times: HE'S PRETTY DARN UNORIGINAL. (Matt Bonesteel)

11. Liberty

Wash. Post series on Maryland propels them to huge wins. Stephen A. Smith article on the Curry Bros. propels them to shooting woes. Direct correlation. (Josh Prywes)

Also receiving pith:

Mount St. Mary's: Nine out of seventeen players on recently named Mount Saint Mary's All-Century team have graduated in the last three decades proving my theory that four months in Emmitsburg feels like a year. (Jack Lambert)

Virginia: Not only am I voting for UVA this week, but I'm doing it without the slightest hint of irony. (Jake Leffler)

The Cavs would be higher if they would've won their recent bracket buster versus N.C. State. (Jack Lambert)

By  |  04:51 PM ET, 03/01/2009

Categories:  College Basketball, College Basketball

 
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