Stephen Hawking analyzes England’s Cup chances. Yes, THAT Stephen Hawking.


This handout picture received from bookmakers Paddy Power on May 28, 2014 shows Professor Stephen Hawking after he presented a formula in London to predict the chances of England winning the 2014 World Cup in Brazil.(AFP/Getty Images)

Professor Stephen Hawking is a British theoretical physicist, and one of the world’s most brilliant minds. Paddy Power is an Irish betting firm, and a leader in the field of public relations stunts. Sounds like two great tastes that taste great together!

Hawking is an expert on cosmological singularities, so it makes perfect sense that Paddy Power would ask him to analyze how England, which has won just a single World Cup (in 1966), might fare in this year’s tournament. Hawking responded with a detailed report (an 18-page PDF can be found here) which was summarized on the company’s blog.

Among Hawking’s findings were that:

  • England should wear its red uniforms whenever possible.
  • It should play in a 4-3-3 formation.
  • It should hope for relatively comfortable temperatures, and start times around 3 p.m.

Hawking also offered advice for the national team on taking penalty shots, a historic source of frustration. The Albert Einstein Award winner suggests taking longer run-ups, to increase velocity, and aiming for the upper left or right corner.

Of course, Hawking is too intelligent to think England actually has a very good chance to win this year’s World Cup, unlike host nation — and five-time champ — Brazil. But you have to love his willingness to chime in on a topic we all can understand, not to mention that fact that he actually makes reference to WAGs in his piece.

 

This former editor and part-time writer at The Post is now happy to prove that if you combine 'blowhard' and 'blaggard,' you get 'blogger.' He previously had used 'Desmond Bieler' as his byline, but feels that shortening the first name to 'Des' nicely conveys his ever-decreasing gravitas. He also covers Fantasy Football.
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Marissa Payne · May 28

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