FEMA’s new hires fall flat


(Courtesy of FEMA.)

FEMA’s newest employees are Flat Stanley and Flat Stella, the popular cardboard-cutout children’s characters. The pair blogged Monday about their first day as part of the federal workforce, when they received their marching orders from Administrator Craig Fugate (helping educate kids about emergencies) and had their photos taken for their government ids.

With all the scrutiny surrounding federal workers these days, we’re pretty sure subpoena-happy House Government Reform Chairman Darrell Issa will be all over this one.

And besides which, the Loop has so many questions: What GS level are they? Are they political appointees?

In a development sure to inflame the critics further, a FEMA spokesman explains to the Loop that they got their jobs through a family connection: Fugate’s young nephew asked his uncle to take pictures with Flat Stanley in Washington. He complied, and was surprised at the positive reception Stanley got whenever he brought him along. So he decided to bring him on full-time (nepotism alert!) to help with the agency’s youth outreach.

Better not send them out to the site of some emergencies, like the western wildfires. They’re a little flammable.

Emily Heil is the co-author of the Reliable Source and previously helped pen the In the Loop column with Al Kamen.
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