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On Parenting
Posted at 03:00 PM ET, 10/31/2012

Family Almanac: When he loves her not

From elsewhere in The Post, a mother worries about how her 14-year-old daughter is dealing with an unrequited crush and asks Marguerite Kelly for advice.


(Hadley Hooper - For The Washington Post)
“I hate to see this lovely young woman pine away over something that was not meant to be. Even though my daughter saw a counselor and was told that she couldn’t nab the boy, she sometimes lives in a fantasy world or in a state of tearful despair. On other days, she accepts the situation as it stands and handles it well, but she gets angry with me if I try to give her some motherly advice. . . .

“Should I be concerned?”

Kelly says the mother should definitely be concerned but should focus more on consoling her daughter than giving her advice.

“The boy may not have cared for her, but he was her first love, and her first loss, and her pain should be acknowledged,” Kelly says. “The sooner you give her your unconditional sympathy, the sooner she can laugh about the mistakes that she and everyone makes between the ages of 11 and 15.”

Read Kelly’s full column or the transcript of her most recent online chat.

Related content:

The ‘glory years’ between parenting and grandparenting

A 3-year-old fights bedtime, leaving mom at wit’s end

By On Parenting  |  03:00 PM ET, 10/31/2012

Tags:  Family Almanac, parenting, advice

 
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