The Washington Post

Chatological Humor: Secrets poll (females)

Today’s poll is about Secrets. We will define a Secret as some fact about yourself, past or current, that few if any other people know, and that you wish to keep hidden. A Secret, by our definition, must be universal: If you don’t want your boss to know you smoke pot socially, or you don’t want your ma to know you are gay, that is not a Secret, so long as there are others who know it quite well. If you are gay and NO ONE knows except your lover, that’s a secret. A secret must be really private, and of some significance to you: Something you really don’t want most people to know. It could conceivably be about someone other than you, but only if you had a stake in it -- if you would personally be embarrassed / upset if it were known (ex: you met your wife in a brothel.)

If you answered no to the first question, your work here is done. You may go back to your admirable, squeaky-clean life. Please take the second poll, and then join us for the chat, which by the way has been pushed back to 1 p.m. on Tuesday.

Everyone else: If you have more than one Secret, for the remainder of this poll, address the one that is MOST secret, the one you’d be MOST concerned about if people found out.

Gene Weingarten is a Pulitzer Prize-winning journalist and writes "Below the Beltway," a weekly humor column that is nationally syndicated.


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