Lady Gaga vs. the Wizards: Every single way this situation could play out (UPDATED)


Lady Gaga performs in Newark, N.J., sort of dressed like a referee? (Carlo Allegri/Reuters)

[NOTE: This post has been changed to reflect the fact that a few minutes after it was published the Verizon Center announced the Lady Gaga concert will be rescheduled to Monday, May 12 to accommodate a possible Game 6 NBA playoff game. “We apologize to Lady Gaga and to her fans for any inconvenience in having to reschedule her show at Verizon Center,” Verizon Center general manager David Touhey said in a statement.]

Of all potential battles brewing in Washington, this one has been by far the most dramatic: The Wizards are in the second round of the NBA playoffs, up 1-0, and if the series against the Indiana Pacers goes to six games, they’ll play at the Verizon Center on Friday, May 15. The problem? Lady Gaga had a concert scheduled at Verizon Center that same night. Cue outrage and dramatic threats courtesy the Little Monsters, Gaga’s diehard fans.

As The Post’s Dan Steinberg noted in his story Tuesday, this kind of thing sometimes happens: Rihanna vs. Brooklyn Nets, Miley Cyrus vs. Philadelphia Flyers, etc. And historically, sports typically bumps music. But Gaga fans are on high alert and ready to fight this time around, especially given that Gaga already canceled a show in D.C. last year. DC Sports Bog rounded some of the more distraught tweets.

However, the Verizon Center decided not to leave anything to chance, and preemptively changed the date to Monday, May 12. (Swapping dates with Gaga’s Philadelphia show, which will now take place May 15.) Still, postponing a concert is a ridiculously expensive and complicated situation; not to mention out-of-town Gaga fans that had plans to visit D.C. next weekend, not on a random Monday. Before we knew about the date change, we rounded up every single way this scenario could have possibly played out.

[Related: How the Wizards and Lady Gaga wound up with a conflict]

1. The Wizards win in four games. Problem solved! Everyone is happy. Except people in Indiana.

2. The Wizards win in five games. See above.

3. The Wizards lose in five games. D.C. sports hopes are dashed again. Little Monsters, however, could not care less.

4. The Wizards win in six games. The concert is rescheduled, but D.C. sports triumph! Little Monsters are devastated.

5. The Wizards lose in six games. This really twists the knife — the concert is rescheduled and playoff hopes are dashed. Terrible.

6. Either way, the series wrap up six games and the Verizon Center decides to simply bump the WNBA game hosted by the Mystics (scheduled for May 16) so the Gaga concert can happen, just one day later. Gaga fans would rejoice, just 24 hours later. The WNBA would sadly come to realize it can’t compete with Little Monsters. (This is very unlikely; see No. 8)

7. The series wraps in six games, the Mystics play as scheduled, and Little Monsters have not one, but two basketball franchises to hate.

8. The Wizards win in seven games. A dramatic victory! The concert is rescheduled for sometime in the distant future. (Gaga has shows back-to-back on May 17 and May 18, so she likely wouldn’t want to perform three consecutive nights). Little Monsters rage.

9. The Wizards lose in seven games. See No. 5.

10. Lady Gaga fans channel all their Little Monster energy and become deranged Wizards fans for the next three or four games. These new fans are overcome with excitement and maybe even transfer some of their simmering rage into angry tweets sent to Pacers players such as Paul George or Roy Hibbert. Win or lose, the Little Monsters enjoy their new fandom and come to a peaceful understanding if Game 6 goes on as scheduled. (Yeah, probably not.)

11. The Wizards have to change the date of their game. That’s extremely unlikely. The playoffs have a national TV schedule to stick to, and while Gaga might have had the clout to compete with NBA playoffs back in 2011, after her latest album flop she just doesn’t have that power now.

12. Lady Gaga changes concert venues. Some acts swap between the Verizon Center and Patriot Center with relative ease, but unfortunately, looks like there’s some sort of George Mason University “graduation” at the Patriot Center on May 15.

13. The concert is flat-out canceled. The concert-on-Friday idea is a logistical nightmare, and a return trip to D.C. might not work with any other commitments. If that does happen? The Little Monster rage of the last few days will look like nothing compared to what’s to come.

UPDATE: 14. Lady Gaga moves her concert date at the Verizon Center to Monday, May 12. (See above).

Emily Yahr covers pop culture and entertainment for the Post. Follow her on Twitter @EmilyYahr.

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Emily Yahr · May 6, 2014