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Posted at 01:47 PM ET, 04/29/2011

Lunchline: Wedding first, prom second

Clinton Yates (Breton Littlehales)
I've seen a decent amount of kisses, both real and fake in my day, and I can only use one word to describe what happened between Prince William and Princess Kate on the balcony at Buckingham Palace: perfunctory. Also, I'm sorry, I can't take Piers Morgan very seriously anymore. His royal smooch breakdown and subsequent rant was just a bit too cheesy for me. Props to you, Anderson Cooper, for keeping everyone's head screwed on straight during the CNN broadcast.

On a far more serious note, the tornadoes that ravaged the South have now been classified by experts as an "outbreak." The twisters that tore through the lower portion of the country killed nearly 300 people as of last night, and the pictures of the destruction are sobering and painful. Not to make this overly personal, but I was relieved when I got an e-mail from my old high school principal, who now lives in Alabama, telling me his family was okay. The Post's Krissah Thompson and Erin Williams talked to some survivors about their experience after they emerged from shelter.

Redistricting is all the rage, now that new census figures have been released. D.C. is not immune to that trend, and council member Marion Barry has been at the forefront of the cause. The "mayor for life" is doing his best to redraw the boundaries of Ward 8 to try to transform that moniker from a symbol of poverty and despair (in some minds) to a vision of hope and development. The Post's Mike DeBonis breaks down how Barry plans to draw new lines in the city, and move his ward to areas west of the Anacostia River.

If we have to go back to England, today, we will. The royal wedding wasn't just a big deal on television sets across the world — some people actually PAID MONEY to watch this event with other people at a hotel. The Post's Annie Gowen was at the Ritz-Carlton for the festivities and documented the early morning gathering, which one person called "the Super Bowl of royal obsession." Sidenote: If you like, I just might share with you a picture of a 9-year-old Clinton standing in front of the palace in London in the rain. Yes, I was wearing Nike Air Dunks.

If Lara Logan had never said another word to anyone else about what happened to her in Tahrir Square, it would be completely understandable. The horrors she endured in Cairo are legitimately and unspeakably disgusting. But after staying silent for a couple of months, the CBS News correspondent decided to tell her story to "60 Minutes." The Post's Emily Wax breaks down the interview, which gets extremely graphic very quickly and includes a supremely chilling clip of the video footage immediately before Logan was violated by hundreds of men.

The Redskins managed to not completely screw up the first round of the draft, it seems. Hooray. The team traded down to get Purdue defensive end Ryan Kerrigan at No. 16, a relative no-name to people who don't extensively follow the Big 10. According to D.C. Sports Bog's Dan Steinberg, his teammates like him, and he's apparently got a tremendous nickname and a new haircut. Sidenote: The Redskins' draft day hats look awful.

Extra Bites

• In other ridiculous pageant news, the White House Correspondents' Dinner is tomorrow. Do I have an invite? No. Will I be attending an after-party? Certainly. Which one? Not telling. I'll be the guy in the white dinner jacket. Seriously. The Post's Dana Milbank is all over the whole thing.

• Slate's Jeremy Singer-Vine answers a question we've all pondered at one point, either for ourselves or others: How Long Can You Survive on Beer Alone?

• This is the most visually fascinating video I've seen in a really long time.

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By  |  01:47 PM ET, 04/29/2011

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