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Tom Toles
Posted at 07:15 AM ET, 02/07/2013

I’m running

I’m throwing my hat in the ring. Make that my Laurel Wreath, for I am running for the Boule. The boule was a council of citizens in Ancient Athens, updated here for the 21st Century. I have some ideas. Here’s my platform.

This is what a typical citizens day might look like. 8 am: Coffee and a newspaper, not read online, but printed on fine quality recycled free-range sheepskin. Healthy breakfast served by robots. 9am: Study and reflection, topics selected by individuals according to their interests. 11am: Report for work. Work would consist of making the world look like a Maxfield Parrish painting, a combination of neoclassical architecture and a beautiful landscape in slightly hallucinogenic colors. With large garden urns. Lots of ornate urns to lounge by in our togas. Yes, we would all wear togas. We would spend our work time carving those urns, and Corinthian columns, or working in the elaborate gardens, or painting the actual trees and mountains those strange colors . All other work will be done by robots. Noon. Luncheon repast, served by robots. 1pm: Discussion. Topics selected by participants. 2pm: another hour of work, if you’re feeling ambitious that day. 3pm: Gametime! Sports, played, NOT watched, scores kept by computers using hard-to-understand algoritihms to dampen ego-driven competitiveness. And board games played on granite tables with marble playing pieces. Wine and cheese served by robots. 6pm: Music time. Lyres not mandatory but strongly encouraged. 8pm: Lavish dinner feast, served by robots. 10:30 pm: Of course, Toga Party! With dancing as long as you can stand up. Then be carried back to bed and tucked in by robots.

That’s my campaign platform, complete with its columns and urns, upon which I do not literally run, but rather recline. Perhaps this is not how the world should be, exactly, but it should be a little more like this than it currently is. Terms are limited to one year. I’ll do what I can.

By  |  07:15 AM ET, 02/07/2013

 
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