"Homework involves an experiment to calibrate the accuracy of your oven, and some calculations to ascertain the number of various molecules in a recipe for aubergine with buttermilk sauce."
"Once you’ve had paid friends who don’t argue with you, it’s actually quite hard to go back to real friends."
"Similarly, I question whether Martin Luther’s experiences are all that relevant to our understanding of modern viral content."
"In that scenario... Facebook's crossover date—the date when the dead outnumber the living—will come sometime around 2065."
"I stand in front of the camera and 20 handlers and hipsters and publicists and crew and Yoko Ono and I think a reporter from Rolling Stone and I tell myself to pretend I can do this and I dance."
"A recent survey of marine plastic debris found something surprising: Nearly 99% of it was missing."
"While laptop users may find the smell of cat urine offensive, 'cat’s pee' is a term sometimes used by wine lovers to describe a wine’s aroma."
"One thing is certain, the billion-plus valuation is worthy only of the ideology of Snapchat, not its potential to make money."
"A doping scandal rocked the hallowed sport of pigeon racing this week after six birds tested positive for performance-enhancing drugs."
"That makes calculating interest rates hard, since savers could pay starship captains to carry them forward in time, to reap the benefits of centuries of accumulated interest."
"When asked about the inevitable comparisons between Midnight Red and One Direction, The Artist Formerly Known as Heroin Eyes explained, "We're a bit different because we dance, so it's not like we're better or worse it's just like, how boring would an ice cream shop be if it only had one flavor?"
It looks like Wikipedia is strangling itself for this resource of new editors.”
"The slipperiness between innocuous utensil and deadly device represents the risk of insurrection."
"Since the early 1990s, we humans have been doing something both odd and eminently sensible: We've been launching jellyfish into space."
"In Rabbit Hash, Ky., a Border Collie named Lucy Lou defeated 10 dogs, a cat, a possum, a jackass and even one human to become the town's third animal mayor—all dogs—since 1998, says Bobbi Kayser, the current mayor's owner."
"The wildlife that lives on the historic 18-acre campus--including a newly arrived fox now making a home at the White House--are having a field day."
By Sarah Kliff
October 15, 2013
"The next time you gaze up at the night sky, remember that you’re looking at a graveyard."
"Open-faced meat sandwiches are kept in check by the USDA whereas closed-faced meat sandwiches are handled by the FDA."
"Monks, he says, should return to meditation, and tougher penalties should be meted out for mischief."
"Occam’s razor was among the deletions, for reasons best explained by way of an elaborate hypothesis."
By Dylan Matthews
October 7, 2013