Today Gene Weingarten is chatting with readers in his regular Chatological chat. But before he started, he shared this poem about the Repulican primary. Join his chat live here.
The GOP Field, in rhyme:
First there was Romney
(The obvious nom’nee)
But conservative folks
Believed him too sane.
So then came Bachmann
(She seemed a lock, man)
But, no, soon came Perry
And then Herman Cain.
The first proved a loony
The second, cartoony
The third couldn’t master
Control of his schlong.
Now Newt’s emerging
(His poll numbers surging!)
But Newt, he’s got “baggage” --
This douche wont last long.
Ron Paul is a-screechin’
And rantin’ and preachin’ --
Let’s make heroin legal!
(There goes the ballgame.)
While poor old Santorum
Can’t muster a quorum
At a meeting of people
Who’ve not Googled his name.
In the end there is Romney
(The obvious nom’nee)
Who will run for the White House
But won’t have a chance.
Though he is not loony,
Oversexed or cartoony,
Folks will not forgive him
Those weird underpants.
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