Here’s where you can put your wedding...

From a reader, whose pain I think many people will feel: “My son and his fiancee announced plans to marry in Capri, Italy. They claim it is a place they love and want to share it with those who are closest to them.

“While I can afford this, NOBODY else in my family can. This location excludes my son’s 92-year-old grandmother and his two aunts, who are both strained by the recession. The cost for my wife, stepson and me to travel to this ‘wedding of a lifetime’ will be at least $6,000 on the cheap, not to mention the time off work for all three of us.

“I’m inclined to say sorry, we can’t go, but am afraid of the damage to our relationship with him. I did offer to host a reception for all those who cannot afford to go, but he declined, saying it would cheapen the ‘real wedding.’ How should I handle this?”

Ideas?

--Carolyn Hax

 
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