Thumbs Down


In April, two African American men sued ABC for rejecting them as potential suitors on the “The Bachelorette.” “I never even had a chance,” one claims, charging that the show gives more time and consideration to white applicants than to people of color.

Indeed, “The Bachelorette” cast is pretty darn white. The new season, which began Monday, had one black suitor, who was quickly spurned by new bachelorette (and single mom) Emily. So the lawsuit seems to make a legitimate point.

But I have a question. Shouldn’t ALL MEN sue “The Bachelorette” for making us look REALLY STUPID? Let’s consider some of this year’s suitors.

Jef. Jef can’t spell his own name! Also, he rides a skateboard without a helmet while hanging onto the back of a limo.

David. A songwriter, David wrote a song about Emily. It goes like this: “Emily. EMILY. EM-I-LY. Uh oh. Emily.”

Travis. He carries an ostrich egg that he will care for as if it were Emily and her daughter.

Tony. He says: “What has two thumbs and is going to marry Emily? This guy!” Tony, I hate to break the news to you, but JUST ABOUT EVERY MAN ON EARTH HAS TWO THUMBS.

Marc Silver has been watching TV since the days when people wrapped aluminum foil around TV antennae to improve reception.
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Kristen Page-Kirby · May 18, 2012