Songs She Will Never, Ever Write


Country crossover star Taylor Swift has carved out a niche penning maddeningly infectious songs about approximately a zillion relationships, most of them unrequited or over. Granted, everyone’s a little overdramatic in their late teens, but now that Swift is 23 we think it’s time for her songs to mature along with her. Here are some suggested titles to inspire her — maybe she’ll get to writing before this weekend’s shows at Verizon Center.

“Hey, Sometimes Relationships Don’t Work Out (I Hope We Can Still Be Facebook Friends)”

“I Am Definitely Going to Learn From This Mistake So I Never Make It Again”

“I Have a Crush on You, but You Have a Girlfriend So I’ll Be an Adult About It and Keep My Mouth Shut”

“Couples Counseling (Let’s Look Into It)”

“Check Out How I Have More Than a One-Octave Range”

“52”

“Your Girlfriend Seems Kind of Annoying, but It’s Really None of My Business”

“Six-Month Anniversary”

“Let’s Keep Our Issues Private, OK?”

 Verizon Center, 601 F St. NW; Sat.& Sun., 7 p.m., sold out; 202-628-3200. (Gallery Place)
Kristen Page-Kirby covers film for The Washington Post Express.
Comments
Show Comments
Most Read
Next Story
Marnie Stern’s blazing guitarwork matures, along with her writing
Stephen M. Deusner · May 8, 2013