Shutdown shopping

dereklamThanks to Congress, starting this week, I have a lot of free time on my hands. I’ve decided to go shoe shopping. I need new tall boots for fall. What do you recommend? — Amy

Manolo says, ayyy! To listen to the Congress peoples shouting about the government “shutdown,” it is as if the mega-major-super disaster had struck the nation, such as the tsunami, or the big earthquake, or the volcano had violently erupted in the courtyard of the Smithsonian, burying the entire Capitol Hill in hot lava. (Although, according to a recent poll, the Pompeii-ization of Congress enjoys the hearty approval of 97 percent of the American peoples.)

And this is why the Manolo is the monarchist, because the worst king is better than the best gaggle of politicians. Imagine how much more pleasant the U.S. would be if, instead of the incessant politicking, we could all relax, safe in the knowledge that our sovereign was, like Charles the II of England, primarily interested in hunting, wenching and amateur theatrics.

No longer will we need to pay attention to our odious political class, always shouting for our attention and insulting our intelligence. Instead we will have the dignified pomp and circumstance of proper leadership.

And, yes, the Manolo has the perfect candidate to be our first king: Jay Leno. He is tall, sufficiently genial and already possessed of the impressive Hapsburg chin. What more is needed?

Here is the Loden from the 10 Crosby Derek Lam ($650, piperlime.gap.com), the boot that will be the perfect feetwear to usher in our new golden age. Long Live the King Jay the First!

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