Everyone who’s ever set up an OKCupid account knows online dating can get weird. Really weird. But if two weirdos meet and discover they like doing weird stuff together? Well, that’s a match made in some sort of weird, weird heaven. (Good thing we like weird.) Plus, read on for stories about candy you can actually crush, reddit apologies, the Super Mario Bros. pornos you never want to see and, finally, we propose to George Clooney. Perhaps he’ll take a 21-day baggage-free trip with us?
“Both ensembles are looking a little threadbare and with good reason: We’ve worn them every day since we left the Houston airport nearly three weeks ago. This is not your average OkCupid date.” — Clara Bensen at salon.com describes her unique date with a match she met online. The “experimental travel” date lasted 21 days, spanned eight countries and had one catch: Neither was allowed to bring any luggage. But you know what they say — the couple that smells together, stays together, and indeed, Bensen reports “the relationship is still intact.” Bonus question: What’s the weirdest date you’ve ever been on? Let us know in the comments or tweet us @WaPoExpress.
“Now you can hone your sweet pattern-recognition skills long after you’ve killed your phone battery.” — Dominique Zamora at foodbeast.com discovers actual candy based on the digital sweets in the popular app-based game “Candy Crush.” The treats were released by Dylan’s Candy Bar, a New York-based candy company, which sadly has yet to release a self-replicating chocolate bar …
“I couldn’t stop because it was a busy intersection, but I motioned to you that I was very sorry. You probably thought I was a monster, but I hope you saw my remorse.” — redditor two_insomnias at Reddit.com attempts to apologize to a man for almost hitting him on his bicycle earlier this week while she was driving. Her apology garnered dozens of responses, both snarky and sympathetic. Many commended her for owning up to her mistake and promising to drive more thoughtfully.
“The mushrooms from the Mario Bros. games are based on a real mushroom with psychedelic effects that make it feel as though you are growing in size when consumed.” — Tanner Ringerud at buzzfeed.com reveals “19 Things You Probably Didn’t Know About Super Mario Bros.” In addition to the above, Ringerud says Luigi’s name was based on the Japanese word “Ruigi,” meaning “similar,” Mario switched his wardrobe when he moved to the Super Nintendo, ditching his red overalls for a blue pair, and, most ick-ily, that Nintendo owns the rights to both “Super Hornio Bros.” and “Super Hornio Bros. 2.” Consider our childhood retroactively scarred.
“It opens with the sentence, ‘You must love him.’ It is unclear whether the 6,062 words that follow are meant to support or subvert this thesis.” — Caity Weaver at gawker.com finds what she believes is a not-so-flattering profile of actor George Clooney published in the December issue of Esquire. She concludes, he’s “kind of an a–hole.” Hmm… we’ll make our own conclusions when we marry him.