‘Game of Thrones’ came back — and spilled plenty of blood along the way

April 10, 2014

Emilia Clarke stars in “Game of Thrones,” which premiered its fourth season Sunday. (HBO)

“Game of Thrones” is back. On Sunday, more than 8 million viewers watched the fantasy drama’s fourth season premiere and subsequent replays. So many people tried to watch it on HBO Go that they crashed the subscriber-based online streaming service!

If you don’t subscribe to HBO or fell victim to the crash, let me fill you in on what happened.

Everyone stabbed everyone else in every place you could possibly be stabbed.

There was full frontal female nudity and there was talk of a four-or-five way, but I kind of dozed off for a second so I can’t tell you if it actually happened.

A pretty lady was stroking a docile dragon, only the dragon got distracted by other dragons and a dead goat. So the dragon turned on her briefly, which is a reminder that you can just never trust a dragon.

People used the “F” word, which is odd because “Game of Thrones” seems to take place in a magical universe where there wouldn’t even be an “F” word, but there it was.

As they’d say in the show’s made-up language Dothraki, “Ki fin yeni!”

(Or “WTF.”)

Marc Silver has been watching TV since the days when people wrapped aluminum foil around TV antennae to improve reception.
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Sadie Dingfelder · April 10, 2014