Gee, does he have a brother?
From a reader: “I am having a hard time understanding my boyfriend. We have been together a year, living together for a few months. He says he loves me and envisions a life together, wants to propose in a few months.
“I am looking for a new job and may not be able to find one in this town; I might have to be long-distance for about a year. This distance is not an issue for me. His reaction: He is not a long-distance person and our relationship will probably fizzle; he also has ‘physical needs’ that have to be met. He then indicated he would be amenable to reconnecting with his latest ex if we broke up, on the grounds that she had family issues while they were dating, she is local, and because she is accessible and ‘low-maintenance’ (slightly overweight, average-looking, grateful and surprised that he chose to date her).
“He then mentioned that each of his past relationships has been progressively easier to get over and that he will easily move on if we break up.
I do love and trust him and don’t think he would ever cheat on me, but that’s hardly the issue here. Is it just me or is this relationship lacking in passion, love, and commitment?”
1. Is the answer as obvious as I think it is; and 2. If so, why do you think she hasn’t fled already? What advice would you give her in that regard?