Date Lab: He didn’t find her fiery side. Or her car.


(Courtesy of the daters)
July 9, 2012
About the daters ...
Dating history as a TV show...

Funmi: This show is about a girl living in the big city with a pretty quiet dating history. She’s sweet and mysterious, but can also have a fiery, fun personality with guys.

Nnamdi: Secret hopeless romantic juggles stereotypes, a career and a confusing time as a 20-something professional in a booming city.

Happiest ...

Funmi: When I’m hanging out and having a good time with my friends and family.

Nnamdi: Around my friends and siblings. I like to keep the people
I care about very close.

Your type…

Funmi: Tall, dark skin, has a good sense of humor, outgoing (I can be shy, so it’s nice to have someone else bringing me out of my shell), and energetic.

Nnamdi: If you asked my friends, I think they will tell you I like women a little on the curvy side. Long hair, nice smile, height varies. ... Think Alicia Keys.

How he/she differsfrom you...

Funmi: I would hope he is much more outgoing than me, so he could bring me out of my shell a bit.

Nnamdi: I hope she was more spontaneous than I am to a certain extent. I plan too much. I hope she was more patient and not too serious.

About the date ...

7:30 p.m., The Bombay Club, downtown

Nnamdi: I got there first, maybe 10 minutes early. I waited at the bar and had a drink. She walked in and tapped me on the shoulder.

Funmi: [I was] about 10 minutes late. I apologized, and he was a real gentleman about it. In terms of looks, he’s not my normal type: He was big; he played football in college, and I usually go for smaller guys. It wasn’t off-putting, I was just surprised. But he wasn’t bad-looking.

Nnamdi: She was pretty. I wouldn’t say she’s what I’m used to, which isn’t a bad thing. She’s the first Nigerian girl I’ve been on a date with. Physically, I saw her as more of a friend.

Funmi: The waiter brought us to the table, and we sat and talked for probably 15 minutes before we ordered anything. We had the crispy spinach [and] a seafood platter. We talked about how we signed up for Date Lab. Then we started digging into our life, hobbies, what we do, and we did find a lot of similarities. He seems like he’s very close to his family, and I’m very family-oriented. The fact that he was Nigerian was unexpected, because I wasn’t sure how many other Nigerians would sign up for something like this, but it didn’t really influence the date one way or another. It was a nice surprise.

Nnamdi: She is more reserved than I am, so I think we were a little different there. She doesn’t go out much, and I tend to go out more, but that’s not a problem with me. Socially, I think that could work. [But] I do like sassy women, and I don’t know that’s in her personality. I like being put in my place, and in terms of being sarcastic with witty comebacks, I just didn’t get that vibe.

Funmi: I don’t think I have the sassy factor in me. I’m just a generally nice person, I guess. There wasn’t much flirting; we were just kind of getting to know each other, laughing a lot and enjoying each other’s company. To me, it seemed like it was more of a budding friendship.

Nnamdi: There were no dull or awkward moments. The conversation was great and easy; it just wasn’t particularly romantic. I think we’d need to hang out a little more to decide whether we’d be better as friends or in a relationship. Sometimes for me it’s hard to tell right away.

Funmi: He asked me what I was doing afterward, and I told him I was supposed to meet up with friends but that I was probably just going to head home. He said he was supposed to be meeting up with his roommate, and they were going to head out somewhere. But he didn’t ask me anything about it after that, so I didn’t know if he wanted to continue somewhere else. If he had asked, I definitely would have agreed.

Nnamdi: I was planning on maybe going somewhere else with her, but I knew she had to drive home and didn’t want to drink when she’s driving. But I guess I didn’t take the initiative, and that’s my fault. I’m bad with hints. We were having a good conversation, so we just stayed at the restaurant a little while. After dessert, I said I would walk her to her car.

Funmi: He tried to walk me to my car, but we couldn’t find it! I had parked it in a garage nearby and couldn’t remember where it was. He was a good sport about it. He said he had a really terrible sense of direction, and I do, too. So we joked that if we went out again, we’d need a GPS. My feet were killing me because I wore killer heels, so I finally just grabbed a cab. He asked if I would be willing to hang out with him again, and I said definitely. We had a lot in common and I enjoyed dinner with him, so I would give it a second try to see if anything else comes out of it.

Nnamdi: I gave her a hug, and she kissed me on the cheek. I didn’t bring my phone with me to dinner, so she called me, and I have her number now. For me — and this came up — it’s just a matter of finding the time, but I do plan on giving her call.

Funmi: He was really great company. I’m usually kind of quiet and can act shy at times, but there was something about him that made me feel at ease. I would give the date a 3.5 out of 5.

Nnamdi: I’d give it a 4. She was such a nice girl, but I’d have to bring her out of her shell before I could say if we could be romantic.

UPDATE: Nearly a week later, Nnamdi said he was still deciding whether to call Funmi. “As of right now, I just don’t have time, and if she’s just going to be a friend, I don’t want to waste her time,” he said.

Nominate a friend for Date Lab! Reach us at datelab@washpost.com or on Twitter @datelab or Facebook and tell us why he or she is a great catch.

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