Log cabin cruiser: A really old houseboat.
Today’s results combine two people’s names into one. For this week’s new contest, we’ll do a variation on that — one that some entrants to Week 963 did anyway because they didn’t read the directions. Instead of portmanteau names, Loser Jeff Contompasis suggests, let’s do portmanteau phrases: Create a phrase that overlaps two terms, each of two words or more, and describe the result, as in Jeff’s example above. The middle word may be only partly overlapped and the spelling may vary slightly (see today’s results for examples), but you need to be able to see both the end of one term and the beginning of the other. The terms can be anything that’s not some individual’s name — it can be a product, business, etc., as well as a generic term: basically, what wasn’t allowed in last time.
The Style Invitational
The Style Invitational is The Post’s weekly humor/wordplay contest, serving up since 1993 an irreverent mix of highbrow and lowbrow -- haughty and potty -- in genres ranging from neologisms to cartoon captions to elaborate song parodies. A new contest appears at washingtonpost.com/styleinvitational every Friday.
Winner gets the new Style Invitational trophy, the Inkin’ Memorial, a majestic li’l Lincoln Memorial-statue bobblehead. (The little plaque will look nicer than the one in the picture, which I printed out at home and taped to a file card.) Second place receives either a really cool bottle of Laotian liquor with a big preserved scorpion inside (you must be at least 21 and able to pick it up from us, preferably at the Flushies, the Losers’ own awards “banquet,” on May 12, because it might leak in the mail) or your choice of the other runner-up prizes. The bottle was donated by Loser 4 Ever Tom Witte. (Flushies info at bitly.com/flushies2012.)
Other runners-up win their choice of a coveted Style Invitational Loser T-shirt, a yearned-for Loser Mug or the brand-new, yet-to-be-designed but surely hotly desired Grossery Bag, a lightweight tote. Honorable mentions get a lusted-after Loser magnet. First Offenders get a smelly, tree-shaped air “freshener” (Fir Stink for their first ink). E-mail entries to firstname.lastname@example.org or fax to 202-334-4312. Deadline is Monday, April 23; results published May 13 (online May 11). No more than 25 entries per entrant per week. Include “Week 967” in your e-mail subject line or it might be ignored as spam. Include your real name, postal address and phone number with your entry. See contest rules and guidelines at washingtonpost.com/styleinvitational. The alternative headline in the “Next week” line is by Mark Richardson; the subhead for this week’s honorable mentions was suggested by both Dave Prevar and Tom Witte. Join the Style Invitational Devotees on Facebook at
Report from Week 963
in which we asked for a “Before and After” name, one combining two names so that the end of one name is the beginning of the other: We did allow for spelling changes in that middle section, e.g., Paula Deen and Dean Martin could combine into Paula Deen Martin.
The winner of the Inkin’ Memorial
Sean Payton Manning: He was fined by the NFL for paying to get himself injured. (Gil Glass, Washington, a First Offender)
Winner of the Wonder Woman costume worn in an indie movie:
B.B. King James: Lo, the Thrill hath gone; yea, it hath gone away from me. (David Ballard, Reston, Va.)