As always with our perennial Join Now neologism contests, Week 976 provided lots of funny combinations of parts of words to make new ones, as you’ll see from this week’s results. And also as always, the Empress received dozens of entries in which the new word was nifty but the accompanying definition a bit niftless. This week we’re going to do a little crowdsourcing: Supply a humorous definition for any of these promising Loser-penned neologisms. You may add a hyphen if you like, wherever you like. Keep in mind that because we’re working from only a few dozen words, many entries are sure to have the same general idea. So the ink will flow to the best-written ones; using the word in a funny sentence might help (using the word in an unfunny sentence will not).
Lafado • Polikin • Beerate • Briswards • Egotor • Manese • Funassiere • Laffast • Medpics • Nixotica • Butthoven • Irritaparent • Punative • Flattivist • Humsic • Hypire • Underuck • Egofast • Hyphoon • Wecation • Mentra • Egoperate • Egojunctions • Harpoonerisms • Ignorent • Polititithing • Diffecation • Prevolving • Neonated • biPod • Frankenfriendly • Punfail • Losery • Incache • Twithy • Beemen • Genew
Winner gets the Inkin’ Memorial, the bobblehead that is the official Style Invitational trophy. Second place receives a very cute little foam-stuffed black-and-white cat. It’s slightly different from most toy cats, though: this one has a Velcro-attachable head, with a blood-red neck area. It’s called Stress Relief Kitty. See, it’s relaxing to carefully put the head on. Donated by Andrea Kelly.
The Style Invitational
The Style Invitational is The Post’s weekly humor/wordplay contest, serving up since 1993 an irreverent mix of highbrow and lowbrow -- haughty and potty -- in genres ranging from neologisms to cartoon captions to elaborate song parodies. A new contest appears at washingtonpost.com/styleinvitational every Friday.
(Pat Myers/The Washington Post) - Stress Relief Kitty: It’s relaxing to put the head on. This week’s second prize.
Other runners-up win their choice of a coveted Style Invitational Loser T-shirt, a yearned-for Loser Mug or the ardently desired Grossery Bag. Honorable mentions get a lusted-after Loser magnet. First Offenders get a smelly, tree-shaped air “freshener” (Fir Stink for their first ink). E-mail entries to
or fax to 202-334-4312. Deadline is Monday, July 23; results published Aug. 12 (online Aug. 10). No more than 25 entries per entrant per week. Include “Week 980” in your e-mail subject line or it might be ignored as spam. Include your real name, postal address and phone number with your entry. See contest rules and guidelines at wapo.st/inviterules. The subhead for this week’s honorable mentions is by Jeff Contompasis; the alternative headline in the “next week’s results” line is by Chris Doyle. Join the Style Invitational Devotees on Facebook at
Report from Week 976
in which we asked you to combine the beginning of one word or name appearing in that week’s Style Invitational or Style Conversational with the end of another word to make a new term: Shockingly, we got many entries featuring the syllable “poop”!
The winner of the Inkin’ Memorial
Ignorial: A monument that nobody visits.
(Robert Schechter, Dix Hills, N.Y.)
Winner of the “Pat the Politician” parody book:
Hyattsvilification: The reflexive dismissal of anything located in Prince George’s County. (David Smith, formerly of Greenbelt, Md.)
Enthusala: A 90-year-old man on Viagra. (Christopher Lamora, Guatemala City)