Seven months ago, Charlie Sheen was on a drug called Charlie Sheen.
Now he seems to be on an image rehabilitation tour unofficially dubbed Charlie Sheen 2.0. At Sunday’s Emmy Awards, he gave his blessing to his former colleagues at “Two and a Half Men,” from which he was fired in March during what I’ll refer to as his Sober Valley Lodge/Warlock Period.
“From the bottom of my heart, I wish you nothing but the best for this upcoming season,” he proclaimed. His words said: “Really, good luck, you guys.” His expressions said: “Really? Am I actually saying this out loud?”
The night after the Emmys, Comedy Central aired its much-hyped Charlie Sheen roast, during which he gamely took every comedic bullet fired at his tiger blood-pumping heart, even the jokes that touched on his drug problems and his children.
“I’m Charlie Sheen. And in here burns an eternal fire,” he said at the roast’s end, gesturing toward his chest. “I just have to remember to keep it away from a crack pipe.”
That fire seems much more controlled than the one we saw earlier this year, during the “rock star from Mars” interviews and the less-than-successful Charlie Sheen “Violent Torpedo of Truth” tour. Sheen was a raging, out-of-control inferno. Now he’s more like the Yule log that flickers peacefully on our TV screens every Christmas Eve. (Actually, that may not be the best analogy: The Yule log at least has one consistent TV gig, while Sheen is still trying to nail his down.)
That Sheen seems saner, more sober and less likely to refer to other people as trolls is undoubtedly good for his health. And tamer interviews he has recently given on the “Today” and “Tonight” shows suggest he’s clearly hoping it’s good for his career, too. But is the public willing to buy the second (or third?) rebranding of the Charlie Sheen image in a year?
The previous Emmy nominee is trying to regain his spot on the airwaves with a sitcom adaptation of the Adam Sandler movie “Anger Management.” Whatever you may think of the guy, he’s at least smart enough to know that the “winning” routine has to go if he wants to lure a network to the project.
But what shouldn’t go is the sense that he’s willing to speak his mind. As nuts and often inappropriate as he sounded during his podcasts and off-kilter tweets, many people seemed to respect, on some level, that he was keeping it real. It’s hard to think of Sheen as still capable of “sticking it to the man” when he stands behind an Emmy podium asserting that the makers of “Two and a Half Men” will continue to make “great television.”
What Sheen needs to do, in this column’s humble opinion, is — first and foremost — stay off of drugs and away from all prostitutes and goddesses. Then he needs to get back on television on a well-written show that’s edgier than “Two and a Half Men.”
And, after he’s convinced the public that he’s not a powder keg, write a tell-all memoir that lays out what really happened during his “Men” days and the bedlam that followed.
Americans admire celebrities who demonstrate guts and honesty. They also admire people who have their personal houses in order.
Time will tell if Sheen can manage to be both.
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