XXX movies! Style Invitational winning movie-title riddles from 2000

The results of Style Invitational Week XXX (published Sept. 17, 2000), a contest in which entrants used a movie title as the answer to a riddle or other question. A new version of this contest was announced July 15, 2011; see washingtonpost.com/styleinvitational, Week 928.

REPORT FROM WEEK XXX, in which we asked you to take the name of a movie and make it the answer to a riddle.

Fourth Runner-Up: Answer: The Thirty-Nine Steps.
Question: What would a recovery program look like if it were designed by Congress? (Cindi Rae Caron, Lenoir, N.C.)

Third Runner-Up: Answer: God Is My Co-Pilot
Question: What is the motto of EgyptAir? (Chuck Smith, Woodbridge, Va.)

Second Runner-Up: Answer: Nosferatu.
Question: What was the sequel to “Nosfera”? (Chris Doyle, Burke, Va.)

First Runner-Up: Answer: Airplane!
Question: What is the last thing you want to hear when making love on what you thought was a deserted runway? (Jennifer Hart, Arlington, Va.)

And the winner of the “Cecil B. Demented” promo kit:

Answer: Only You.
Question: Is it only me, or is it high time for Pee-wee Herman to make a big comeback? (David Genser, Arlington, Va.)

Honorable mentions:

Answer: Sympathy for the Devil.
Question: If Satan married Darva Conger, what would you feel? (Chris Doyle)

Answer: Attica.
Question: What is Martha Stewart’s cutesy-poo name for the stuff she stores in the top floor of her home? (Phyllis Kepner, Columbia, Md.)

Answer: Being John Malkovich.
Question: What is better than being Izzy Malkovich? (Tom Witte, Gaithersburg, Md.)

Answer: The English Patient.
Question: Which patient is least likely to complain about the lousy hospital food? (David Genser)

Answer: Brazil.
Question: What is the capital of Argentina? — George W. Bush, Austin (Cindi Rae Caron)

Answer: Ordinary People.
Question: What do you get when you put ordinary people on a remote island for 39 days? (Mike Genz, La Plata, Md.)

Answer: Fanny by Gaslight.
Question: What is the advertising slogan of Ye Olde Proctologist? (Catherine Hagman, Silver Spring, Md.)

Answer: Ice Station Zebra.
Question: What is the Secret Service code name for the White House master bedroom? (Russell Beland, Springfield, Va.)

Answer: The Last of the Mohicans.
Question: Who was Running Eunuch? (Chris Doyle)

Answer: Malcolm X.
Question: What was the sequel to “Malcolm IX”? (Chuck Smith)

Answer: Punchline.
Question: What was best to avoid in Jonestown? (Chris Doyle)

Answer: Total Recall.
Question: What ever happened to that product, “Baby’s First Bunsen Burner?” (Jennifer Hart)

Answer: The Player.
Question: Which is better, Michael Jordan the baseball player or Michael Jordan the basketball executive? (Russell Beland)

Answer: Apocalypse Now.
Question: In order of desirability, rank a feminist organization and the end of the world by hellfire. (Chris Doyle)

Answer: Eyes Wide Shut.
Question: What is the best way to watch the movie “Eyes Wide Shut”? (Roger and Pam Dalrymple, Potomac Falls, Va.)

Answer: The Day the Earth Stood Still.
Question: How do you describe really, really bad sex? (Greg Arnold, Herndon, Va.; Tom Witte)

Answer: Hocus Pocus.
Question: Name an ancient Roman magician. (Richard A. Licata, Wheaton, Md.)

Answer: Virtuosity.
Question: What does one lose the first time one has cybersex? (Stephanie Cangin, Roanoke, Va.)

Answer: Beach Blanket Bingo.
Question: What is easier than beach blanket chess? (Chuck Smith)

Answer: Duck Soup.
Question: What is good advice for a food fight? (David Genser)

The Uncle’s Pick:
Answer: The Sound of Music.
Question: What do you hear when you fall in love? (Cheryl C. Kagan and David Spitzer, Rockville, Md.)
The Uncle Explains: I am delighted to report that this entry was written on her honeymoon by Mrs. David Spitzer.

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