Going through Customs: How to make reentering the U.S. a lot more pleasant

Some confiscated matter is obvious, such as giant African snails (prodigious procreators and no natural predators) and chicken feet from China (avian flu). But what about the ornately decorated ostrich eggs from South Africa? Though harmless to the eye (and to the stomach, as most of us don’t dine on artwork), the eggs can potentially harbor the avian flu virus. “There is no way to cook it out,” said Davis, as he showed me an egg expertly painted with images of African game.

A number of animal- and plant-based items aren’t banned outright but require additional qualifiers. For example, meats from Iceland, New Zealand and Australia are permitted, but those from much of Europe are banned. The difference? The former nations have no reported cases of foot-and-mouth disease. To be prudent, the agency recommends that you skip all beef mementos.

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A cheetah is being held at London's Heathrow Airport by border officials after it was stopped en route to Russia with a missing identity microchip. (Jan. 12)

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When goods are seized, travelers not only lose their souvenirs (Davis and his colleagues can recount many a tale involving tears or tantrums), but they also risk paying a fine. The first offense costs $300, the second $500, the third $1,000. Do it again and the State Department can curb your travel privileges. Makes you think twice about bringing in those yummy beef candies from China.

Honesty, however, can save you some Franklins. “All you have to do is declare it,” said Davis, “and any fines are waived.” The officials also factor in agreeable behavior.

In all fairness, sometimes the rules are fuzzy or complicated. For example, you can bring in unlimited quantities of red caviar and 125 grams of sturgeon caviar but not beluga, which is endangered. No on African elephant ivory but yes on warthog and hippo ivory (as long you comply with foreign laws). Dried fruit is permissible, as are juices and souvenirs constructed of processed coconut husks and seeds.

“You have to be very careful bringing in animal products because there are many, many protected species,” said French. She said to check with the CBP or a wildlife specialist before your trip. If you’re already abroad, ask the vendor about the product and obtain any relevant paperwork regarding its origins. If doubt remains, pass on the purchase.

The fish and wildlife experts base their decision on a combination of policies, including local laws and regulations, and the Convention on International Trade in Endangered Species, a multi-country conservation agreement. However, even I, an untrained observer, sensed that the proteins tucked inside a suitcase from Cameroon were not permitted.

While I was inspecting French’s box of banned finds, a young woman started to open her bags beside me. I put down the pair of Italian designer heels made of tagu, an endangered lizard, to watch.

Peeling back layers of clothes, an agriculture pro discovered parcels of meat wrapped in newspaper: cow skin, beef and bush meat topped with a fish swallowing its tail. The smell was overpowering, and the sight of half-cooked brown chunks squelched any appetite for lunch. The woman, clearly upset, muttered that she’d spent $100 on the meats.

But she didn’t protest as agents seized the goods. She zipped up her luggage and rolled the lightened load through the doors, and into the United States.