Friday rant: The pink, tender feelings of the rich edition

January 31

“What IS that noise that drifts up from so far beneath me? Did I not pay premium rates to have that noise cancelled away from my zone of hearing?” Yes, there seems to be an audible rustling down there amongst the crumbs that have dropped so generously from the Mighty Table. The Mice and Men below (How DOES one tell them apart?) have mysteriously switched from awe and worship of their masters to something more akin to… disdain?! And how DARE they that?

“I am NOT clueless as to the hopes and dreams of the Little Ones. I am clued-up personified. They HAVE no hopes or dreams. They do not NEED them to do their paltry tasks. Nay, hopes or dreams would only interfere with their Blind Dedication to the Company and satisfaction with their miniscule remuneration.  They have but either reverence or disgruntlement, and it appears they are indulging their weakness for disgruntlement. Weaknesses R they.”

Oh let us pause to heave sobs of tears for the rich as they realize they are no longer loved or admired. Money HAD bought them admiration, but now the price has gone up! They do not like this, being value vultures and all. But that’s the Marketplace of Status for you. What IS the current price for admiration in today’s trading?

Here’s the bargain, take it or leave it. Either you actually DON’T care about the Little Ones, in which case their contempt for you is well-earned and accurate. Or, if you DO care, start talking and acting like it, and use your position and wealth to do some good in the world for somebody other than yourself. Ouch! What a price!

Tom Toles is the editorial cartoonist for The Post and writes the Tom Toles blog.
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Tom Toles | January 30