I love that appearing on — not starring in, but appearing on — a TV show set in the fictional town of Pawnee, Indiana, makes Lowe an expert on Indiana. Or maybe it makes him an expert on fiction from Indiana.
Hey, Lowe may literally be the prophet of our generation. (And if you don’t watch “Parks and Rec” you won’t get those italics, but that’s okay; you should be watching, because the show is hilarious and Lowe is hilarious on the show. And now, he’s hilarious when he’s not on the show as well.)
Still, maybe we shouldn’t laugh. Manning may yet retire; who knows? With his neck condition, he’d be foolish not to at least ponder it, in my opinion. Lowe’s “people,” however, apparently don’t include Manning, but he is friends with Colts owner Jim Irsay, plus his character Chris Traeger is friends with Tom Haverford, who is friends with Detlef Schrempf. If Lowe ever tweets any good gossip about Schrempf, you can take that to the bank. (Li’l Sebastian was “my people” in Indiana, even though he was a tiny horse, but he’s gone to the small paddock in the sky.)
However, Lowe isn’t completely clueless. He also called the Trinity squash team’s loss to Yale, ending college sport’s longest losing streak. He tweeted during Saturday’s Broncos-Pats game: “tebow looks hurt, bruised chest? torn rib cartilage, maybe? ouch” and then later, “brady and I both went from long hair to short; he looks better, I look great either way”. Sunday he revealed “my people tell me the Colts will take andrew luck with the top pick”.
This could start a great trend, actors breaking news about sports stars via Twitter. The New York newspapers could drop their beat writers and let Spike Lee handle the Knicks singlehandedly.
Here are some other celebrity tweets that for all you know might be real:
Alec Baldwin: “Hear the Jets are dumping Sanchez for Pey — oops, here comes the flight attendant. Abort!”
Laverne and Shirley: “Our people at the plant say Prince is heading to Washington! Schlemiel! Schlimazel!”
Jane Rizzoli: “Celtics are too old! Break up the Big 3!”
Maura Isles: “Garnett, Allen are free agents at the end of the season, clearing up cap space then. Calm down, Jane.”
Mary Richards: “Donovan McNabb refuses to use wristband with Redskins, teleprompter with ESPN.”
Horatio Caine, removing sunglasses: “Dwyane Wade’s ‘ankle injury’ requires further investigation”.
Jean Dujardin, star of “The Artist”: “ ”
Late-breaking tweet from Rob Lowe: “Correction: I meant to say that my people told me Eli Manning had the stomach flu.”