Sixteen years ago, when Connie English was pursuing her MBA at the University of Virginia’s Darden School, students didn’t want to talk about taking a break from the career ladder post-MBA to start a family or pursue some other personal goal. Now, as Darden’s director of Alumni Career Services, English counsels alumni who are re-entering the workforce after taking time off. She also finds that today’s students yearn to talk about their options.

Last year, a large group of second-year Darden MBA women asked the school to help facilitate conversations about work/life planning. The result was a panel discussion featuring two types of female alums: moms who had taken time off and were looking to re-enter the job market, and moms who had continuously worked full time and hired nannies. (A 2004 survey showed that historically, 65% of all women who have earned their MBA from Darden continuously worked full time. Among the 35% who have taken time off at some point, only about half returned to full time jobs within 10 years).

Weighing the Options

“When should I have children?” was students’ number one question at the panel discussion, says English. MBA students who attended the event ranged in age from about 26 to 30.

The panelists agreed that there is no right answer. It needs to be an individual decision.

To maximize their options, though, women also need to strategize. English advises: “Excel in your first three years out of business school. Make yourself worth so much that it would be difficult to let you go.” That helps put you in a good negotiating position if you then end up wanting to cut back or take time off.

Most Darden grads start their MBA careers in consulting or investment banking, two of the most high-paying, time-demanding business career paths. “It takes two or three years to develop a reputation and skills that you can transfer [to a different job] through referrals,” says English.

Fortunately, all types of employers, including consulting firms, are beginning to offer more job flexibility, English reports. “They’re aware of the brain drain,” she says. “Things will have to get better.” Employers don’t want to lose top-performing women (or men, for that matter) who are starting a family.

For women who are contemplating career time-off, English’s advice is to try to keep a hand in the work, even if that means putting in only five hours a week. Freelancing is often feasible for those who do project work, finance, strategic planning, or internal consulting.

When planning to start a family, a key question to ask is, “If I have children in the next few years, how can I best set myself up for one or more of the following?”

• Take time off;
• Work part-time; or
• Pay for quality child care.

At the same time, you’ll want to make sure your job remains at a level you feel you deserve. English finds that women often want to maintain their intellectual status, and that they see themselves as role models for their daughters.

MBAs who drop out of the job market entirely can count on finding a job when the need arises, says English, but it might not be at the desired level. “The main thing such women have against them is their confidence level,” says English.

Values and Goals

Part of planning how you will balance career and family life involves deciding what’s important to you and defining success in your own terms.

“You need to feel the intrinsic value of your work,” says English. “You need to define that in your own mind.” She finds that MBA students show a strong need to believe in the product or service they are working for.

The sense that “what I’m helping to promote is adding value to the world” is a growing theme among MBA students, male and female, says English. “They see that their parents worked long hours, but for what? So they want to believe in the product, whether it’s life insurance or baby equipment.”


How One MBA Couple Achieved Balance

As director of Alumni Career Services at UVA’s Darden School of Business, Connie English has found her personal experience very helpful for counseling other women about issues of work-family balance. She writes:

My husband, Austin, and I graduated from Darden together in 1991, and we have dealt with dual career decisions ever since. We have two children: Pierce, age 12, and Kate, age 10. Right out of Darden, I worked in Strategic Planning for PepsiCo in a highly sought-after, well-paying job. Austin worked in a similar role for Carrier Corporation.  Both companies tend to move people around, so one of our career paths had to give.

I really wanted to work in a role where I would be helping people and making talent management decisions, so I left PepsiCo when Austin was transferred to Georgia in 1993. I took a job in Human Resources with JM Huber Corporation. While my salary was lower than before, I was very happy in this new role and I discovered that success has a very personal definition.

That premise became even stronger when I became a mom. Pierce was born in Georgia in 1995, and I continued to fit life with work. Then, I chose to take a hiatus from work when Austin was transferred to Pennsylvania and I was pregnant with Kate.

While the initial adjustment of being an “at home” mom was uncomfortable, I soon filled my intellectual and leadership needs with volunteer opportunities that mostly revolved around my kids. After two more moves, both kids had started school, and I decided it was time to return to the paid work force. However, I wanted to find a position that would allow me to help people and still have the flexibility to do things like coach my daughter’s basketball team and run Vacation Bible School for my church. 

I returned to my alma mater, Darden, in September of 2001 as Associate Director of Alumni Career Services on a half-time basis. As my kids have grown and become more self-sufficient, I have been able to ramp up my career. I was promoted a couple of years ago and now work on a .75 full-time-equivalent basis as Director of ACS. I am able to drop my children off at school and pick them up at the end of the day. Since most of my work of counseling alumni on career transitions is done over the phone, I am able to work remotely when necessary. The best part is that most people at work don’t even know that I’m not “full time,” and I have a very meaningful role in the organization.

Meanwhile, Austin left the corporate world six years ago and has found a work/life fit as an operations and productivity consultant. He is able to leverage the operations and general management experience that he gained through a nine year career at Carrier/Pratt&Whitney. He travels a couple of days a week and is able to plan his schedule around any travel I need to do to give seminars or talk to alumni groups in other parts of the country. 

We’re both very involved in our kids’ lives. For example, Austin coaches Pierce’s lacrosse team, and I coach Kate’s basketball team. We’re very satisfied with the balance we have found as a family.