"It was devastating," says Judi Sopher, 56, one of the siblings. She calls it "sheer sadness."
And Sharon was "scared to death," her sister recalls.
Sharon Sopher, right, and Elizabeth Ventura take in Sopher's photo exhibit of women living with HIV and AIDS. The exhibit, along with a screening of Sopher's documentary, were held at the Department of Health and Human Services.
(Michael Williamson -- The Washington Post)
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But when cornered, Sopher has always mustered for a fight. Those instincts eventually kicked in with AIDS.
She rebelled against the notion of keeping quiet. She bristled against the box -- "woman with AIDS" -- into which she'd suddenly been placed. As she began her anti-retroviral medications and saw her strength returning, she began to reach out to others like her.
Sopher met Beth Bye, another Wisconsin woman with AIDS, during a talk Bye was giving in Milwaukee about the illness.
"She had not been open about her status prior to that, and she was pleased that there was someone else out there that was vocal about their status," says Bye, 45, of Wausau, Wis. Bye, a special-ed teacher, also had been advised by AIDS counselors to keep a low profile, to "think really carefully about who I disclose to, that people probably would not understand."
Bye joined with Sopher and is among the women depicted in the photo exhibit. Sopher began shooting photographs even before she began her film. One led to the other. And Judi, her sister, urged her on.
"I was telling her that if anybody was going to speak about this . . . nobody can tell a story better than a person walking in those shoes," says Judi.
Telling Mother
Shooting began in earnest last year, when Marv Turner, an Emmy-winning cameraman, offered to help. He'd heard there was a filmmaker in town who needed someone to run the camera.
After shooting TV news for about 20 years, as well as a documentary on the Bosnian war, Turner, 38, had retreated to Madison so his wife could be near her family. And he dedicated himself to doing film work for faith-based or nonprofit organizations.
"I said to her, 'I know you can't pay,' " says Turner. " 'We'll keep tab of rates and I'll give you an invoice. If you can pay, you'll pay. If not, I'll consider it a tax write-off.' "
"If this can help Sharon or people like Sharon, then this is more gratifying than a nice paycheck."
The film was screened in September at the New York AIDS Film Festival. Last month, a small invited audience viewed it at the Department of Health and Human Services, where Sopher also addressed the President's Advisory Council on AIDS.
And this week both Africare and the Women's Research and Education Institute held their own screenings of her film.
In the documentary, Sopher unwraps her Emmy Award statues (including one for "Witness to Apartheid"). Both are broken. And her quest to have them repaired becomes a metaphor for fixing herself.
