Career Track Live

The Washington area is a magnet for smart, ambitious young workers. Post columnist Mary Ellen Slayter writes a regular column for these professionals who are establishing their careers locally, and offers advice online as well.

The transcript follows below.

Editor's Note: Washingtonpost.com moderators retain editorial control over Live Online discussions and choose the most relevant questions for guests and hosts; guests and hosts can decline to answer questions.

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Mary Ellen Slayter: Good afternoon, everyone! I hope you're all doing well.

My last column was about tattoos and what to do with 'em at work. Do you cover them? Let them show? I got a lot of e-mail feedback on this topic, some of it downright vitriolic. It seems that even as tattoos become more common among young people, other people seem determined to think they reflect some grand statement about a person's character or politics. What do you think?

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Anonymous: After a traumatic workplace incident (a supervisor who went off the deep end assaulted me), I stepped out of journalism for a while. Then my daughter was deployed overseas in the wars and I took care of her baby for two years.

I'm dying to get back to writing and editing. But five years without published work makes me look underqualified in a highly competitive field ... yet with 15 years of experience, I'm overqualified for the break-into-the-field positions.

Any advice on how to get back to doing what I do best?

Mary Ellen Slayter: Skip the job ads, and start working your contacts in journalism before. There's no need for you to pursue entry-level jobs. One thing you might consider to freshen your clips is to start freelancing as much as you can. It gets your name out there, and lets you show what you can do. You could also consider taking a class at your local j-school. It's also a good way to build up your network again.

Editors are a notoriously tough bunch, but I can't can't imagine one not being moved by your story about taking care of your grandbaby while your daughter was at war. Keep me posted on how it goes.

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Foggy Bottom, D.C.: I'd like to suggest that we all put together "kudos files" to be ready for reviews. A kudo is praise. I save every e-mail that I get that says "good job" or "nice catch." I save yellow stickies that contain any kind of a compliment. I also save any suggestions for how to improve my performance. And whenever I start or finish a project, I put a note in there detailing my role, how the project went, and what could have improved it. When review time rolls around, I pull out my folder, and there's most of what I need to do a credible self-review. Also, when I'm blue or rushed or feeling abused, I leaf through my folder to get a boost. I also use the folder when applying for new jobs. I've had one going all my working life. We all need them.

Mary Ellen Slayter: I think this is a good idea, actually. I don't keep a folder, but I do try to save e-mails and comments that I get from people.

Likewise, when other people do great stuff, for me or just as part of their job in general, I try to send their boss a note as well as them. It really does make a difference, I think.

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Washington, D.C.: How does one find a "headhunter" and how is that different than an employment agency? I've been told employment agencies merely read the classified ads as we all do. I often hear of people being "recruited" by a headhunter but have no idea how to make such a thing happen, if it actually does.

Mary Ellen Slayter: First of all, it's not true that employment agencies "merely read the classifieds." They have their own databases of jobs, which they seek to fill under contracts with the employers. The number of jobs in those databases dwarfs what you would find in the classifieds. Simultaneously, they build up databases of job seekers and try to match the two.

A "headhunter" is a recruiter, who can work for employers or for employment agencies. You can approach them, asking to be added to their databases, and if they have a match, they'll call you. The thing to remember is that they don't work for you. They work for the employer. You might get the cold shoulder when you first contact them, only to be slammed with phone calls and e-mails three months later when a job pops up for one of their clients that you are a match for.

Cold-calls from a recruiter are fairly rare. That mostly happens in fairly tight-knit industries, when a recruiter's client is seeking a specific skill set that isn't all that common. Some recruiters would just search through the databases of jobseekers on Monster and the like. A well-connected recruiter can work their contacts to find suitable people through word-of-mouth.

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Springfield, Va.: On a scale of 1 to 10 how important is it to personalize cover letters for a specific company when you're applying to many places?

Mary Ellen Slayter: 10

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Washington, D.C.: Say you already have a job but always look for another. What's the feeling on handing out your current business card with your resume, and using a work email address to correspond with employers? Are either of those poor taste or perhaps illegal?

Thanks!

Mary Ellen Slayter: It's not illegal, but it's tacky.

Don't you have a personal e-mail address? I have like 100 gmail accounts to give away; e-mail me after the chat if you need one.

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Reston, Va.: Hello,

Personally, I don't think that showing ink or piercings is appropriate in the work place -- ever. When I've been in the position of hiring people, if they showed ink/inappropriate metal, I would not hire them. For me, they don't know how to dress for a job.

And I'm in my mid 30s, so it's not an age issue.

Mary Ellen Slayter: See, I think it depends on the job and on the tattoo. If you're a bank teller, yeah, cover it. If you're a techie, who cares?

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RE: Career switch: I am a high-level executive assistant -- I make good money, but I'm a bit bored with the work. I've been thinking about getting a diploma in paralegal studies -- I've always been interested in law, but I've never worked in a law firm. I imagine the work would be more interesting and challenging than my every day tasks. I understand there would probably be long hours and demanding bosses, but that is no different than my life as an exec. assistant. I don't mind those factors. I don't know any paralegals and would like to see if any of your readers have any sage advice -- I'm curious if it could be rewarding work or is it complete drudgery?

Mary Ellen Slayter: Why not go halfway and get a job as an executive assistant at a law firm? It's a way to see how you like the environment without committing to a completely new career.

I'll throw this out there for the chatters ...

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Reston, Va.: I completed college last year and have had various jobs in toxic work climates. I'll spare you the details, but I've met some very unsavory people.

My mom was talking with one of her friends about my experiences and the friend hired me. I started about a month ago. It is a very small, private company. The family friend who owns it decided to create a marketing department and has made me manager of marketing. She is sending me to school for more specialized training.

The problem is that several people are angry because they have been there for years and feel the opportunity should have been offered to one of them. The owner has talked with each of them individually to try to lower the tension and address their concerns. But a few people are turning up the heat. Now the owner is considering hiring a few additional people and then (after the new hires are trained), terminating the ones who are causing so much disruption. She tells me not to worry, that these things happen. But I continue to feel guilty. I was wondering if you have ever encountered such a situation?

Mary Ellen Slayter: I've seen it many, many times.

However, I rarely ever see anyone make such a bold move as to actually correct the problem by removing the offending people. Usually, they're just allowed to hang around, sabatoging morale till the end of time. Good for your boss.

You're fine. Unless there is actual age, gender, racial or religious discrimination going on in these hiring/firing decisions, they people need to grow up.

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RE: Tattoos, nose rings, etc.: I think it depends on your field -- I have a friend with a nose ring, but she's an architect with a less-traditional firm.

If you work for a conservative industry, cover up! You aren't being a cool rebel, you're being disrespectful and kind of silly. Pointless rebellion should end by age 18.

(For what it's worth, I'm 28 and a non-inked member of the tattoo generation)

Mary Ellen Slayter: I agree. I think it's all about context. Some fields almost expect you to have body art and/or piercings, it seems.

Geography also plays a part, I think. One of the things that has struck me on my visits to Seattle and Portland is how much more openly displayed tattoos and such are. It's just a different sensibility from the East Coast.

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RE: Reston, Va.: I guess the HR person in Reston who flatly refuses to allow managers to hire people with tattoos, wouldn't hire any Marines who happened to have tattoos?

Mary Ellen Slayter: I guess not.

Nor would they hire me.

Bummer.

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RE: Customized cover letters: I will just echo you on that being a "10." When I'm reviewing applicants' resumes, I want to know why they want, and think they're suited for "this job at this organization," not just "any job." Especially when the specific fit isn't immediately obvious from the resume.

Mary Ellen Slayter: Yep.

Also, applying for so many jobs that you feel that you don't have time to personalize the letters should be a warning sign. Step back, do some research and narrow down the field. The more closely tailored the application, the more effective it will be.

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RE: Tats/Piercings: I work as an assistant to a Senator and I wear my very tiny nose stud every day. I started off not wearing it, wore it one day whe the Senator wasn't in and asked the Chief of Staff if he thought it was appropriate and then took the plunge and wore it one day around the Senator. It is so small, that the Senator did not notice for weeks. When he finally did, he said "hey, did you know someone punched a hole in your nose." I think it is all about how you handle it. I tested the waters and asked directly.

Mary Ellen Slayter: I was really hoping this story would end with the good senator getting a nose ring of his own.

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RE: Paralegals: I know when I was temping, I was sent to law firms pretty often. They sometimes would offer to send me to paralegal classes if I was willing to come on board full-time. It wasn't my interest, so I politely declined.

So I'd recommend getting an administrative job at a law firm. If you want to take classes, they'll work around you and possibly even pay for it!

Mary Ellen Slayter: thanks!

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Washington, D.C.: Is it legal to demote an employee without informing him
in writing of that change? I had numerous responsibilities
added to my position description when the change
occurred, but was moved to an existing slot at a lower
grade level because "that's what the old job was."

Mary Ellen Slayter: It's legal, unless a contract says it isn't.

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Washington, D.C.: Hi Mary Ellen,

Not sure if this question is better sent to Michelle Singletary but I thought I'd send it and get your thoughts as well.

I have a 401K retirement account through my work. I just realized that I have enough saved up in it to either (a) pay off all my student loans in full or (b) make a downpayment for a house. I understand that there are tax and early withdrawal penalties if one cashes out a retirement accont early. I am in my early 30s by the way. Is cashing out for the reasons I cite above a bad financial move?

Thanks

Mary Ellen Slayter: Bad idea. The purpose of that money is to save for your retirement, not pay for your house or you education. Find the money for meeting those two goals elsewhere in your budget.

The tax consequences of that move (you'll only get about half the balance of the account if you withdraw now) precisely to discourage you from doing this.

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RE: Law firms: In my experience, law firms are loathe to hire anyone who doesn't have law firm experience. Even in IT, I was turned down for not having law firm experience.

Mary Ellen Slayter: Sooooo .... how do they ever find anyone to hire? You have to get that experience somewhere, right?

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RE: Tatoos: I wonder what the HR managers who refuse to hire people with tatoos would do if presented with a Holocaust survivor or other forcefully tatooed person?

Mary Ellen Slayter: Apples and oranges.

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Washington, D.C.: For the young person with the opportunity offered by her mom's friend and the resentful co-workers, I would suggest taking a hard look at your own behavior.

You state that you finished college 1 year ago and have been in "several" toxic work environments. That's quite a bit. And now in this new place, it's toxic again. What a coincidence.

I think you should really look at your own behavior and be really sure that you are not part of the problem. One bad office is one bad office. 4 bad offices is either partially your fault or an incredible string of bad luck. I would guess it was the former.

Mary Ellen Slayter: This may be true, but I'm not sure that what's going on at this current place could be construed as his or her fault.

Besides, I think a lot of times the work environment *everywhere* looks hostile when you first get out in it. Some of us are wise enough to recognize the unchangeables of human nature (office gossips, clockwatchers, neat freaks, slobs, etc) sooner than others and adjust to them quickly. Others are more sensitive.

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Bethesda, Md.: Just my two cents, but I think another factor in whether a tattoo should be out in the workplace is what that tattoo is. A small heart or flower is a lot different than an arm mural.

Mary Ellen Slayter: Are knives OK if you're a professional chef?

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None of my business but ...: What kind of tattoo do you have?

Mary Ellen Slayter: One of them is the royal seal of Queen Zenobia of Palmyra on my upper left arm. I am an unrepentent Classics nerd. Yes, I am going to make you look that up.

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Washington, D.C.: Thanks for taking my question. Friends up in NYC are now telling me that following an interview, they e-mail their thank you notes immediately afterwards, and then follow-up with the hard copy in the mail. Apparently, if a potential employer/manager doesn't get one electronically by the next day, you're automatically striken from consideration. Have you heard if this trend has made it down here?

Mary Ellen Slayter: Your friends are smart.

I don't know about "automatically stricken," but you really should send a follow-up e-mail within 24 hours. The handwritten note is a nice touch, but probably overkill if you sent out personal e-mails.

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RE: Tatoo: My 22 yr. old granddaughter has a small butterfly tatoo on her lower back, a little below her waistline. I don't particularly like or dislike it, but certainly don't judge her character by it and no one else should either! She's a lovely, hardworking, intelligent compassionate, funny young lady. Now, when I was a young girl, my parents would not allow us to date any fellow with a tatoo. (Back then females getting tatoos were unheard of). So we grew up thinking tatoos were a sign of tackiness, at best.

Mary Ellen Slayter: Yay for cool grandparents!

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RE: Stud vs. hoop: I had a small stud that was viewed as cultural as I am SE Asian -- I mainly got it b/c I wanted it, though.

I talked to a lot of women with nose rings after I got mine, and one thing we collectively noticed is sometimes the type of nose ring matters -- i.e., studs can be small and barley noticeable, while hoops are not.

Mary Ellen Slayter: Good point.

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Washington, D.C.: With all the viruses out there, I've heard not to attach resumes, cover letters, writing samples, etc. Instead put them in the body of an e-mail. Is this actually the recommended practice? It doesn't help with formatting. Thanks!

Mary Ellen Slayter: Check with the person you're submitting it to and see what they prefer.

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Mary Ellen Slayter: We're out of time! Thanks for all your comments and questions. E-mail me at slayterme@washpost.com.

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