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The Congressman's Solar Flair

Childhood pet: "I had a dog named Boozer. We had to finally put him to sleep because his hormones were on overdrive: Anytime a nearby dog was in heat, he would jump over the fence and was enraging everyone in the township. We probably should have neutered him."

First celebrity crush: tennis star Chris Evert.


Rep. Brian Baird jokes that President Bush is looking into the sun. (Lauren McFalls - AP)

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Year I'll collect Social Security: "I'm with the majority of people my age who think it's more likely that we're going to see a flying saucer rather than a Social Security check in our lifetime."

Favorite film comedy: " 'It's a Mad Mad Mad Mad World.' The chaotic nature of the movie is totally unique. And it's about seeking treasure. I've always been one who's loved the pursuit of money."

Favorite band: "We have a shrine to the Beatles in my living room, all of the album covers. For our Christmas card two years ago, we redid the Abbey Road cover walking across Freedom Lane in McLean where we live. I forced our 11-year-old to hold the cigarette like Paul McCartney did. My wife had a fit."

Most influential book I read in college: " 'Atlas Shrugged,' of course."

If I could sleep with anyone living or dead, it would be: " Maria Sharapova. Those legs!"

Most notable characteristic: "Chick magnet."

In my bedroom you'll find: "Wall-to-wall Sports Illustrated covers from the 1960s and 1970s. My wife isn't wild about it, but I'm the king of my castle. The hero of my life is Ralph Kramden, who used to say, 'I'm the king of the castle, and you're just a lowly knave, Alice.' "

The first line of my obit should read: "He came, he saw, he kicked their [butts]!"

Adult entertainment name (childhood pet plus street name): Boozer Meadow.

SQUIBS

• Getting in the act: The Greater Southeast Community Hospital pays its respects to Johnny Carson today by hosting a tribute with aspiring comedians and other local performers from noon to 2 p.m. "This is a minority hospital and a lot of minorities who are in Hollywood now owe their start to Johnny Carson," says the hospital's Rocky Twyman, listing Flip Wilson, Redd Foxx and Eddie Murphy. But it's not just for laughs: Donations from the event will help fund shipments of clothing and other relief supplies to hurricane victims in Haiti.

• Ein Fuehrer, Ein News Channel? Leave it to CNN founder Ted Turner to make the link between Hitler and Fox News. He enlivened a confab of TV execs in Las Vegas yesterday by indirectly comparing Fox's ratings success to Hitler's popularity in prewar Germany. The big-mouthed billionaire also called the Iraq war "obscene and stupid" and described Fox as a tool of the Bush White House, but noted, "There's nothing wrong with that. It's certainly legal," reports Broadcasting & Cable. A Fox spokesman fired back: "Ted is understandably bitter, having lost his ratings, his network and now his mind."

Jonathan Cheban, the power-phoning New York flack profiled in yesterday's Style section, has been banned from VH1. The network acted after learning that Cheban was getting paid to promote Evian water at the time that he was talking up the stuff on an episode of "The Fabulous Life." A VH1 spokeswoman told The Post's David Segal: "The network had no idea that there was any connection between Evian water and Jonathan Cheban. We're not going to be booking him in the future."

With Anne Schroeder


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