Gough would never argue that virtual visitation is the same as being there, but it's a right worth fighting for, he says. He has created a Web site, www.internetvisitation.org, to push legislation in other states, particularly Wisconsin. He plans to promote the Utah law next month as a model for other states when the National Conference of State Legislators meets in Salt Lake City.

He'll also be in the District this weekend to demonstrate Internet visitation to a group of dads in situations similar to his during the First Men's Rights National Congress (www.mensrights2004.com) at the Carnegie Endowment for International Peace. But as the Orlando case proved, virtual visitation isn't the sole province of men.

Carrie Ellis is a virtual mom and creator of www.distanceparent.org. She has been using a webcam to communicate for two years now. Her son Kegan, 4, lives partly with his father in Tennessee. She lives in San Diego. Since her son hasn't started kindergarten yet, she has lots of in-person time with him, she says. He's with her all summer until he starts school in Tennessee in the fall.

"When I didn't have the in-person time with Kegan, the webcam kept me sane," she says. "I looked forward to it every week. Now, using better technology, this time apart coming up should be a little more bearable."

Currently, Kegan's father virtually visits with him. "We have regular visitation once or twice a week by webcam -- as well as sometimes special sessions when either my son or the other parent requests it," Ellis says.

She hopes to get to the point where video can be streamed constantly from Kegan's room in Tennessee to her computer in California. "Kegan's father and I work a lot and we are in different time zones. so both of us have cell phones, which have been invaluable. Kegan can call the other parent on his way to school in the morning or on his way home -- or while the other parent is at work."

Some family law specialists have hailed virtual visitation as a peace offering during custody battles.

"Families broken by divorce cannot be put back together in precisely the same way," says Kimberly Shefts, a conflicts analyst with the law firm of Katten, Muchin, Zavis and Rosenman in Chicago, who has been researching the trend in virtual visitation for more than two years for the American Bar Association's Family Law Quarterly. "But virtual visitation is one way children can be protected from feelings of abandonment." In her research, she has come to believe that technology can be used to supplement parent-child relationships in nearly every case. She is researching whether online communication reduces in-person contact, and says so far she has not found many cases where that has occurred.

The National Center for State Courts, an organization charged with helping courts better serve the public, has noted that "courts are increasingly implementing virtual visitation." But some father's rights groups remain skeptical, fearing that virtual visitation will make it easier for mothers to move children out of state. Debates about the pros and cons of high-tech visitation have dominated several online discussion groups.

David Levy, executive director of the Hyasttville-based Children's Rights Council, says the key is whether virtual visitation is a substitute for access, or an aid to real parental access. "Some parents are encouraged to allow a move-away on the promise that there will be e-mail and phone contact, and now webcam access. Parents should oppose such move-aways," he advises.

On the other hand, says Levy, when computer technology truly assists a parent's access to the child, it can indeed help maintain the relationship.

That's certainly been his experience, Gough says.

"The difference is amazing," he says of his and Saige's lives. "I am able to show her things and she is able to show me things. I was able to see the haircut she managed to give herself, her dinosaur outfit that she planned to wear for Halloween and the roar she was ready to give along with it. . . . My first virtual visitation of 20 minutes was better than the previous 18 months of telephone calls combined. I'm able to watch her grow and change.

Jim Buie shares his experience as a "virtual dad," and the experiences of a dozen other families in the book "Virtual Families" and on the Web site, www.virtualfamiliesandfriends.com.