You were here last year for the Academy Awards.
Spend Oscar night again on washingtonpost.com with movies editor and awards show junkie Jen Chaney. She'll serve as your guide to all the red carpet shenanigans, surprise winners and censored comments from host Chris Rock. Read along while you watch the show and feel free to submit questions and comments. After all, what would Oscar night be without a few snarky remarks?
The much-coveted Academy Award statuette.
(Alan Diaz - AP)
A transcript follows.
Editor's Note: Washingtonpost.com moderators retain editorial control over Live Online discussions and choose the most relevant questions for guests and hosts; guests and hosts can decline to answer questions.
Jen Chaney: It's Oscar night and we're live ... from Arlington, Va.
OK, so I didn't get to go to the Academy Award. But that just means I get to spend the evening with you guys. I'll be providing updates and commentary throughout the evening so feel free to send in questions, remarks and sarcastic observations of all kinds.
As the Black-Eyed Peas would say, let's get it started in here.
Southern Pines, N.C.:
I heard today that an Oscar winner lives on average four years longer than the the other actors. Why do you think that is?
Jen Chaney: Well, mainly because they're blessed and far superior to the rest of the human race. I'm not a medical professional, of course, but that seems like the obvious explanation.
Here are my catty coments watching Joan and Melissa's red carpet show...
Eeek, keep Melissa away from that white marker!
Ziyi Zhang. Nice dress, though boring black. Marcel waves are great, best jewelry of the night. Really can't speak English.
Helen Mirren: Fantastic gown, looks great without mimicking the ingenues.
Emmy Rossum -- Awesome color dress, the jewels look like something dragged from her granny's jewel box. Blah.
Catalina Moreno--Boring hair (ponytail, huh???), great dress, super necklace
P. Diddy: Girlfriend is wearing necklace that must have come from a yard sale. Also is wearing that kind of fishtail dress that was popular in 1986. How did a style maven like Diddy link up with her?
Imelda Staunton: This is an actress who looks remarkably better in person than on the screen. Clothes (no jewelry) forgettable. Amazing make-up.
Zana Briski: Perfect color, tasteful necklace
Hilary Swank: Retro 1940s dress has a great back view, super color, but she really needs to wear bigger earrings to balance out the intense ruching of jersey at her neck.
Melanie Griffith: 1992 sequined bridal dress from New Jersey discount store, dyed gray.
Scarlett Johansson. Boring but nice dress. Amazing makeup and hair (love jewelry there). Needs medium-sized earings.
Drew Barrymore: Hair color is terrific on her. Make-up a bit harsh, looks older than age (30), nice dress, but black is not as good on camera as a saturated color.
Virginia Madsen: Looks younger than Drew! Nice dress, but large rhinestones look tacky.
Julie Delphy: Amazingly draped dress, but the kind that wouldn't look good on anyone heavier thn anorexic.
Kristen Dunst: Ooh, the hair is the new grey! Lovely lace dress, but looks a bit more like a cocktail dress than a formal.
Oprah: Her figure looks great, but that color is...army green??? Appears to be handing with the What Not To Wear makeup lady...wearing a pantsuit???
Sandra Oh: Oh, those rocks!!! She has to be wearing several million's worth! The broach at the center of the back is lovely, too!
Selma Hayek: Nice dress--interesting, now they bleep out "booby" from Melissa's commentary. But she's right...Selma does have a remarkable degree of...ahem...uplift.
Cate Blanchet: Yow! Amazing! Great broach. Love the maroon sash!
Joan Rivers: Lavender rhinestone dress and lavender eye shadow. Blechy old lady stuff that defies her facelifts.
Also, have to say nearly choked at the Bjork dress commercial for M&Ms ... watch for it if you missed it!!!
Jen Chaney: Now this is the kind of analysis you just can't get anywhere else. Thank you, Vienna. I particularly appreciated the breakdown on Melanie Griffith.
Laura Linney's on TV right now; a beautiful woman, great actress, usually looks fab on the red carpet. But not tonight. She looks washed-out in that beigey color.
Hi Jen! I am watching the pre-show and would it be petty for me to pick on the fashions already? What is up with Hilary Swank's dress?
Jen Chaney: Sure, it's petty but that's what we're here for, Bethesda. I kind of liked Swank's dress, actually. A bit more coverage than we usually see at the Oscars but I thought it was flattering on her. Others I think look great so far: Kirsten Dunst, Beyonce, Cate Blanchett, Kate Winslet. Oh, here's Orlando Bloom. My, he's attractive.
Feel free to write in often with more petty comments.
Why oh why do I have to see Billy Bush? Why does this moron have a television career? He squicks me out.
Jen Chaney: Squicks you out. That's an interesting choice of words. I like it.
I've been squicking all day long, between the Rivers team and Star Jones Reynolds. So many ways to make myself nauseated, it's hard to find the time for all of them.
Do you expect any politicial speeches from any of the winners tonight?
Jen Chaney: It's always a possibility, but I don't see this as being a particularly political year. Those sorts of comments will come mostly from host Chris Rock, I suspect. I can't wait to see what he does during the opening monologue.
Jen Chaney: Scarlett Johannson: Like the dress, needs to defrizz the hair.
More breaking news to come.
Jen Chaney: All right, I guess I should talk predictions since the show starts in less than 10 minutes.
Here's what I'm thinking:
Adapted Screenplay -- "Sideways."
Original Screenplay -- Possibly "The Incredibles," probably "The Aviator," wish it would be "Eternal Sunshine."
Director: I'm going with Scorsese.
Supporting Actor: Morgan Freeman.
Supporting Actress: Cate Blanchett, but I think Virginia Madsen could pull an upset.
Actor: Please. Jamie Foxx.
Actress: Hilary Swank.
Picture: "Million Dollar Baby."
Feel free to share your predictions, kids.
Renee Zellweger used flat black shoe polish to dye her hair ... what a great idea!! I hope K-Mart is still open so I can get ME some and look just like Renee!!!!
Jen Chaney: Meow, Lexington. I don't think it looks that bad. It's grown on me a little. My issue with Renee is that she needs to gain some weight. When she turns to the side she disappears.
Kathy Griffith's bit about talking on the phone with stars got real old real quick. There were some laughs, but Star Jones was funnier (maybe not on purpose).
Jen Chaney: Oh, I definitely don't think it was on purpose.
My co-worker told me that Joan Rivers asked Imelda Staunton if she'd ever met fictional character Vera Drake, possibly the dumbest question of the evening so far.
Oh, it's starting soon. Everyone remain calm!
I don't think that Hilary or Annette will win.
I'm thinking upset in their category.
Jen Chaney: It's totally possible. Everything seems up for grabs this year, with the exception of Best Actor.
It's entirely plausible that Kate Winslet (nominated four times and never won) could sneak in and grab it.
I would like to start a last minute write-in candidate tonight...
Billy Bush for best impersonation of a human being.
Jen Chaney: I don't know. He faces tough competition from some of the people on the Style Network.
By the way, you all do know Billy Bush is related to the President, right? Hope you enjoy your tax audits this year!
Has the show begun yet? I don't get that channel here! Also, how have Star Jones et al been doing this season (I have been overseas for months)? I always like Joan.
Jen Chaney: It just started. They're doing a montage on movies narrated by Dustin Hoffman at the moment.
Personally, I think Star is awful. Joan screws up names and such, but that sort of entertains me. Still, I think they could do better on those shows by going in a totally different direction. I say have Vince Vaughn host the pre-Oscar show and see how he does. Here comes Chris Rock. Fasten your seat belts.
Jen Chaney: Chris Rock's getting a standing O. And he's already said the word ass.
Dang, he looks sharp.
Jen Chaney: People Chris Rock has mocked so far: Nicole Kidman, Tobey Maguire, Jude Law (wow, he's ripping him).
Jen Chaney: Chris Rock: "Can you imagine reapplying for your job while there's a movie showing all across the country that shows how much you suck at your job?"
He's letting it fly now.
Just to say, my girlfriend is Canadian and is missing the Oscars because she hasn't got satellite! She's v upset, but is extremely pleased by this live coverage from the Washington Post. She says thanks for this! She also asks: is Quentin Tarantino there? Is he bitter that his "Kill Bill" double-bill (hehe!) didn't receive a nomination?
Jen Chaney: I'm so glad we can help out your girlfriend. I haven't seen Quentin T. I don't know if he's bitter, but he had to realize his movie probably wasn't getting a nomination.
Chris Rock just finished up and he killed. Now Halle Berry's presenting Best Art Direction and all the nominees are on stage, as promised by Gil Cates.
Here comes the Bush bashing ... Look out!
Jen Chaney: Good stuff all around. One of the best Oscar openers in recent memory.
Neverland, Just beyond the next star:
Johnny Depp -- Will he EVER win an Oscar? Or is he just not enough on the "scene?" He's about the most versatile, talented actor around, but he certainly marches to his own drummer.
Jen Chaney: "The Aviator" just won for art direction. A signal of more to come?
Johnny Depp is a terrific actor and definitely quirky, and I certainly hope he stays that way. I think people respect him for it. He'll get an Oscar at some point because he's so consistent and he almost always chooses parts wisely.
Best Supporting Actor is coming up, here comes skinny Renee.
What's with the people standing on the stage? Are they making the nominees line up? It makes sense ... but seems weird.
Jen Chaney: Gil Cates planned to do this; some awards may be presented in the audience, too. But probably not in any of the major categories.
And the winner for Best Supporting Actor is ... Morgan Freeman.
You're right Renee looks very thin. Eeeww!
Jen Chaney: Hey, I gotta call 'em like I see 'em.
A remarkably short speech from Morgan Freeman. Hey, maybe this thing really will end before the alleged blizzard starts here in Washington.
Arica, Chile, South America:
I wish you'd talk more, we don't get it live down here..........what's happening.....
Jen Chaney: Sorry, I'm typing as fast as I can. I'll do my best to keep you apprised. Right now you're missing a Cadillac commercial.
Standing there next to that Amazon in the red dress with the white trim, Renee looks like one of Santa's elves.
Jen Chaney: Almost anyone looks like an Amazon next to her. I think my five-year-old nephew outweighs her.
Chris Rock is great, but I forgot for a minute that he's the host of the Oscars. Sadly, I bet because of this he won't be back again. But he sure is worth watching this year....
Maybe he'll keep the pace up and move this thing along faster than it usually moves.
Jen Chaney: His monologue was very much like one of his routines, but I think that's a good thing.
Robin Williams just made a Viagra joke. I think he's about to present Best Animated Feature.
Joke from Robin: "SquarePants is not gay. Tight pants is gay." Now he's impersonating Scorsese and Robert De Niro.
Hey Jen, some of my favorite Oscar moments are the controversial ones, awkaward speeches, etc. Can we expect anything like that tonight?
Jen Chaney: I don't know about controversy but I can almost guarantee you awkward. That tends to happen every year.
Chris Rock isn't doing so bad on the controversy so far, though.
San Diego, Calif.:
So far the commercials are better than the show...we'll see how Robin does.
Jen Chaney: "The Incredibles" just won Best Animated Feature. Mark your ballots accordingly. Director Brad Bird is accepting at the moment.
He's thanking people at Disney and his parents and wife. Pretty dull, but he too was quick. Apparently everyone's sticking to the 45-second rule.
If "Sideways" doesn't win for Best Pic, there is no justice in the world! Go Jen!
Jen Chaney: I don't know if that's going to happen. Would be a cool surprise.
Cate Blanchett just presented an award for make-up to the peeps from "Lemony Snicket." As promised, it was presented in the audience. I don't know how I feel about that format. It's a little weird.
Drew Barrymore is introducing the first performance of a nominated song from the film "The Chorus." Beyonce's performing, and she's singing in French. She seems a little nervous.
I hate the presentation in the audience to the "lesser" nominees. Can this be any more condescending?
Jen Chaney: I agree, it does seem condescending. If I win, I want to be able to get up on stage like everybody else.
OK, now Beyonce's struggling with this song. Granted she has to sing three of these numbers tonight, but her voice usually sounds stronger than this.
Might be time to grab that second glass of wine or water, everybody.
I heard Robin Williams had a whole bit about SpongeBob being gay but ABC axed it -- was that what the gag in his mouth was about? And then did he just go ahead and do the bit anyway?
And you have to feel sorry for those people not important enough to stand up on stage. That was taaaaacky.
Jen Chaney: I think you're right. And yes, he appears to have done it anyway, unless there was more to it than what he said.
Wasn't that funny, really. But not worth censoring either.
San Ramon, Calif.:
Morgan Freeman - so deserving of a win! What a gentleman in his acceptance speech. Can do without the French song - time to take an intermission while this is going on
Jen Chaney: Yes, it was great to see him win. Easy Reader's got an Oscar! Very cool.
While you're up, can one of you grab a glass of wine for me? Thanks much.
Oooh, Beyonce struggled with that French. I'm sure it's not easy to learn, but she really butchered some of that.
Jen Chaney: Oui, oui, D.C.
Chris Rock said it best - if you can't get the singing nun, dont get Beyonce.
Jen Chaney: In the words of Napoleon Dynamite: Dang!
Okay, I HATE the new format where they are presenting from the audience. Talk about screw the winner out of the chance to walk up onto the stage.
Beyonce sounds weird - maybe that's not her type of song. Not a fan.
Jen Chaney: So we're all in agreement: Nix the awards from the audience. Gil Cates, are you listening?
Beyonce has two more songs yet to redeem herself. Let's let the first one slide and hope she does better next time around. Unfortunately she has to sing with Josh Groban, and that can't help matters for anyone.
And we're back with Chris Rock ... and some dude just ran off stage. Oh, goodie, a comedic montage...
Jen Chaney: This is great. Rock's interviewing people at the Magic Johnson Theatres (including Albert Brooks). And it closed with Martin Lawrence holding an Oscar and saying: "Those of you who thought I couldn't win one can kiss my black a--." All the people they interviewed hadn't seen any of the Best Pic nominees but they loved "White Chicks."
That was very funny. Rock is rockin' it. Which means we'll be back to Billy Crystal next year.
Los Angeles, Calif.:
Thanks for taking questions, it's like attending an online Oscar party! Re: predictions - the buzz, including yours, seems to be MDB for best flick. (Spoiler alert) I saw it the other night, and while I liked it--thought Swank was amazing, Freeman and Eastwood their usual understated selves. But with the exception of Swank's performance, I don't feel the movie overall was GREAT. I thought the script was a bit thin and I figured out the ending as soon as Hilary's character hit the chair. All that said, I haven't seen any of the other movies nominated, so don't know how they stack up against MDB. And no one's mentioned Annette Benning, who looks AMAZING. Farewell from Hollywood!
Jen Chaney: Bening does look amazing. Wow, you're really in Hollywood. Can you smell the star power from where you sit?
Pierce Brosnan is on, presenting costume design, and again the noms are all on stage. Well-dressed lot, too. Here comes Edna from "The Incredibles," too. Cute.
As to "MDB": I loved it. Yes, some of it was cliche and predictable. But I thought it was so artfully done, beautifully shot and acted. And it hits people in an emotional place, in a way that most of the other Best Pic nominees do not. But we'll see what happens.
Pierce is hot even with scratchy voice. I'd make him chicken soup anytime...
Jen Chaney: See, I always assumed James Bond never needed a lozenge. Apparently I was wrong.
Okay, I'm going to court controversy by saying I don't think the new formats are so bad. I think it's awkward and boring to wait for people to walk up to the stage and this way we cut to the chase and get right to the speeches. And part of the fun of the art and costume design candidates is seeing how the nominees dress -- this way we get to see them all.
Maybe we could get some of those people Chris Rock interviewed as presenters next year. They were fun. And how about getting Edna to be a presenter for costume design? That alone makes this one of the best Oscars ever!
Jen Chaney: We welcome dissenting opinions.
I don't mind seeing the noms on stage. I just don't like the audience part. As was said before, it seems like a ripoff to those who don't get to go onstage.
Tim Robbins is presenting Supporting Actress. Chris Rock's intro: "When he's not dazzling us with his acting, he's boring us to death with his politics." Robbins was laughing when he walked onstage.
Fairfax Station, Va.:
What's up with the microphones?
Jen Chaney: What do you mean? I haven't noticed anything strange with the mikes.
Cate Blanchett just won Best Supporting Actress. No surprises yet. And that's three for "The Aviator." Speech is pretty pat and unemotional.
What's with "Cate Blan-CHETT?" When did that start?
Jen Chaney: As opposed to BLAN-chett? I don't know, I've always said Blan-CHETT. Let's take a poll: How do you all say Blanchett?
Silver Spring, Md.:
I can't belive "Napoleon Dynamite" hasn't been nominated for anything.
Jen Chaney: I can believe it, even though I really dig that movie. Speaking of, Pedro and his twin brother were on with Melissa Rivers earlier today. That's right, there are two Pedros.
OK, is Tim Robbins up there to give lip service to politics when they are afraid to ever let Michael Moore on the stage again?
Jen Chaney: No, he was up there because he won Best Supporting Actor last year. They always do it this way.
I think Moore would have been nominated for "Fahrenheit 9/11" if he'd put it up for Best Doc instead of Best Picture.
Now they're showing a pre-taped tribute to Johnny Carson.
Silver Spring, Md.:
Being from England I may be an authority on this. I can confirm its Blan-CHETT. Nice frock by the way
Jen Chaney: It is a nice frock. Not many people can pull off yellow, but Blan-CHETT is doing it.
Maybe Fairfax is referring to people's words getting clipped by the audio engineers. It almost sounds like censorship at times. I thought they had the 5 second delay to protect us from hearing such scandalous words as "ass".
Jen Chaney: My heavens, did you just say the "a" word?
Forgive me, I missed the clipping. The sound of my typing drowns out the ceremony sometimes. Ladies and gentleman, in the audience, I give you Jay Z.
DiCaprio is presenting Best Documentary Feature. Cross your fingers for Morgan Spurlock.
Not sure what Johnny Carson has to do with the Oscars, but it was a nice tribute
Jen Chaney: He hosted many times. That seems like reason enough for a tribute. He was one of the betters hosts, too.
All the Best Doc nominees are on stage now. This idea they stole wholesale from Michael Moore; remember when he made his fellow nominees get up there with him?
"Born Into Brothels" just won Best Doc.
Fairfax Station, Va.:
Will a doc winner have class enough to mention Michael Moore?
Jen Chaney: The answer to that is no. Kauffman and Briski didn't mention "Fahrenheit," though I don't think they really needed to. It's not like that movie needs the publicity.
Orlando Bloom and Kirsten Dunst (soon to be seen in Cameron Crowe's "Elizabeth") are presenting Best Editing ... "The Aviator" won. That's four.
Ok, can Kristen Dunst have a real hair color already? Neither blond or red look good on her.
Jen Chaney: I don't know, I don't mind it so much. I think her dress looks great.
Mike Myers is introducing the Counting Crows, singing nominated song "Accidentally in Love." You know, back in 1994, I never thought I'd see the day when the Counting Crows would be on the Oscars. But here we are.
Actually, this might be the only Counting Crows song ever that didn't make me want to kill myself.
I don't even mind that I am at work (in the ER) right now and missing watching the awards. Reading these comments is just too much fun; I am laughing aloud! I will keep checking back for updates to pass along. Enjoy, and please do it again next year!
Jen Chaney: You're in the ER? First of all, bless you for working hard. Second of all ... is anyone bleeding or dying or anything? If not, then by all means please check back. I just don't want to be indirectly responsible for anyone's death.
I surely will do it again next year, though it would be nice to actually go to the Oscars someday. Or at least get to watch them on my HD-TV at home. We don't so much have the HD here at the office. Not that I'm complaining, mind you. I'm actually having fun so far.
What was up with Kirsten Dunst bringing her younger brother tonight? You think he's gonna hook up with Tara Reid?
Jen Chaney: I find it interesting that she brought her brother and Jake Gyllenhaal (hot even with the buzz cut) brought sister Maggie. Maybe Maggie and Dunst's brother will hook up. That would be a fun little scandal.
Tampa, Fla. (formerly D.C.):
Okay, what is it with the hair on the lead singer from Counting Crows?! I have to admit I've never seen them (like their music though). Has he always looked like this? I'll bet years from now he will look back on this performance and cringe. If he has any shame at all...
Jen Chaney: Yes, he's always looked like this. For more than a decade now. Adam Duritz indeed has no shame.
"Aviator" is four for four. A sweep is in the works.
Jen Chaney: It could be.
Catherina Zeta-Jones was supposed to come out with Adam Sandler (supposedly) but Chris Rock is now reading her presenting "lines" with Sandler.
They're doing screenplay now. Is it me or is this zipping along? Maybe I'm just having so much fun.
I wonder why there are so many empty seats in the balcony?
Jen Chaney: To make room for the presenters, I'd imagine. The Oscar for adapted screenplay goes to ... "Sideways." No surprise. But so nice to see Linklater, Julie Delpy and Ethan Hawke be recognized for "Before Sunset" even though they didn't win. Payne just said he wants to share his award with the cast and crew of the film. He and Jim Taylor made a short but nice speech.
Here's Jake Gyllenhaal and Ziyi Zhang with visual effects.
Pimmit Hills, Va.:
Adam Sandler just said a screenplay can be an "adaption" from some other source. Shouldn't he have said "adaptation"? Do you think he misread the teleprompter or they just wrote it incorrectly into the script? English teachers are screaming and changing channels.
Jen Chaney: Sandler mispronouncing a word? How could that have happened? Probably was a misread. "Spider-Man 2" just won for visual effects.
I prefer Jake with more hair.
Jen Chaney: I like Jake with or without hair, but preferably accompanied by a strange rabbit named Frank.
Here comes the Academy President. Time for another beer/wine/soda run.
What's with the "I'm from England"?
Cate BLANCH-ett is Australian.
Jen Chaney: Good point. But English people are smarter about knowing how to pronounce words than we dumb Americans, so I still think our British friend from Silver Spring serves as a valid resource.
That tight camera angle (with little head room) and the gold curtain behind make it look a bit amateur. Like a comedy skit rather than an awards show.
Jen Chaney: Yes, the curtain reminds me a little of "The Tonight Show." Or possibly "The Gong Show."
The honorary Oscar to Sidney Lumet is being presented by Al Pacino. We're getting close to being halfway through the awards and it's not even 10 p.m. I can't believe it.
I've been giving some thought to the set up with all of the nominees on stage for the lesser awards. I think it's awful because if you win, you have to awkwardly acknowledge the others while jumping up and down (like the "Spider-Man 2" guys). And if you lose, you can't slink down in your seat. You have to stand up there while the winner gives a happy speech. It sucks.
Jen Chaney: True. But it also lets them be seen by the viewers, and these are people who rarely get major recognition for their work. So it's more interesting to watch in that respect.
Having said that, I would hate to stand up there and slink away.
It does seem to be moving right along... is that bad?
Jen Chaney: I don't think it's bad, although I will say there hasn't been a particularly memorable moment so far. The speeches have been particularly listless. Nice and by the book, but not particularly exciting.
Fairfax Station, Va.:
Who's getting the Thalberg?
Jen Chaney: Lumet's getting an honorary Oscar for lifetime achievement, but it's technically not the Thalberg. At least I don't think so. They don't give out that award every year.
It looks like Scorsese is crying. Maybe he's moved by Lumet's speech ... or he just really wants to get up there himself.
Man, that's quite a body of work. I'd forgotten he was behind some of those.
Jen Chaney: It is impressive. That was a good speech, too.
The shots of River Phoenix in "Running On Empty" made me sad, though. He was so talented.
This guy is Mr. PC.
Jen Chaney: True, but it was a pretty classy speech. Not memorable, but (like everyone else tonight) nice.
Who is that woman with the enormous ta-tas they keep showing holding hands with the women on either side of her?
Jen Chaney: Can we say ta-tas in this discussion? I guess we'll find out.
I can't say for sure, but it was probably either Lumet's wife or daughter. I'm hoping daughter, but you never know.
"Nice and by the book, but not particularly exciting." That's how I would describe many of the films nominated this year.
Jen Chaney: Maybe so. But you know what movie was awesome? "White Chicks."
How long has River been gone now? He was indeed talented and one of my favorite young actors. I guess the In Memoriam tape will be shown soon. That always makes me sad. It seems like we've lost so many good people this year.
Jen Chaney: You're right. Johnny Carson, Ray Charles, Marlon Brando, Ossie Davis. There will be lots of applause during that tribute.
River Phoenix died in 1993. Hard to believe it was so long ago.
Here comes Emmy Rossum from "Phantom." That means it's time for more Beyonce.
A very graceful salute to Lumet and a very graceful response by Lumet.
I'm really enjoying the Pepsi commercials with movie tributes. Nice cameo by Carson Kressley.
Thanks so much for doing this, Jen -- you and your coterie are delightful Oscar-watching companions. Pass the popcorn.
Jen Chaney: In the words of Star Jones: "You're just fabulous. Truly amazing. Wonderful."
Seriously, though, glad you're enjoying it. Can you pass the popcorn? I could go for some right now.
Beyonce's doing better with Andrew Lloyd Webber, by the way. But what the heck is the deal with that Phantom on stage with her? You know what would be awesome? If he took off his mask and it turned out he was Rob Lowe.
Why is Beyonce singing the song from Phantom?? Why can't Emmy Rossum sing it? She is so much better!
Jen Chaney: Good question. Why didn't Emmy do it? That's a little insulting, isn't it?
If you can't get Sarah Brightman, don't get Beyonce.
Jen Chaney: Snap!
Ack! A hotel in LA is looking for their missing chandelier -- it's choking Beyonce!!
Jen Chaney: Good one! I also think Boy George is looking for his missing eyeliner, which wound up all over Beyonce's eyelids.
I think the Post said that Minnie Driver got booted from the show to give Beyonce another song. Bleah! I'm gettin really Beyonce'd out!
Jen Chaney: You're right, Minnie Driver was originally supposed to do it. Did something backstage just fall while Jeremy Irons was talking? There seems to be a lot of that tonight.
I'd prefer to see Beyonce just get up there and so "Crazy in Love."
We're doing live action short subject, and we're in the audience again.
I like Jeremy Irons's tux! Nice variation.
Jen Chaney: Andrea Arnold just won for "Wasp." She just said winning was "the dog's bullocks." Nicely done.
Not sure how I feel about the tux. Like the variety factor, but am not sure how flattering it is. They've even got Laura Linney presenting in the aisles.
She's doing best animated short.
And you got all snarky on me for making fun of Renee Zellweger's flat black hair, and here you are getting catty about Beyonce.
OK, I laughed too.
Jen Chaney: Oh, you can make fun of Renee. No one's stopping you.
Chris Landreth just won best animated short for "Ryan."
Is it "bullocks" or "bollocks"?
Jen Chaney: I think it's bollocks. I misspell every now and again.
On the other hand, maybe we should ask the Blan-CHETT Brit from Silver Spring. Help us out again, would you?
Why is everyone bashing Beyonce? She has a strong beautiful voice and she looks amazing. I'm sure it is very difficult to learn a French song and perform it at the Oscars, along with two other songs.
Hmmm...I wonder why everyone is so negative towards her. She didn't noticeably mess up.
Jen Chaney: I didn't think she sounded bad. I just think someone put too much eyeliner on her.
Let's not start any conspiracy theories just yet.
I love Kate Winslett's dress. I've never seen her in a bad outfit.
Ugh. My favorite for cinematography NEVER wins! Things are looking good for The Aviator. Somehow, I just have no interest in seeing it.
Jen Chaney: Winslet just gave cinematography to "The Aviator" (No. 5 for that movie, I think).
You should see it. I thought it was very entertaining, though not particularly deep. Leonardo was excellent, too.
London UK, re: pronunciation:
Always wanted to say that in a Live Online discussion
Jen Chaney: And there it is, straight from the keyboard of someone from the UK.
Now that that's resolved ... never mind the bollocks. I love a good Sex Pistols joke.
Has "In Memorium" shown yet at the Oscars? I just got in. Thanks
Jen Chaney: Not yet. The death parade is still to come.
In the meantime, here come Penelope Cruz and Salma Hayek.
Jen, how are you doing overall with your predictions?
Jen Chaney: Thank you for asking, Grasonville. I'm three for three so far. Too bad I didn't enter a pool.
Holy cleveage, Batman!
Jen Chaney: Why, thank you. Oh, wait ... you mean Salma Hayek, don't you?
They're presenting sound mixing right now. And the winner is ... the team from "Ray."
True or false ...Chris Rock just said "you won't be able to take your eyes off the next four presenters ... Penelope Cruz & Salma Hayak"?
Jen Chaney: True. I think he was referring to their ... um ... ta-tas.
What's up with Jamie Foxx's head?:
It looks like he has some sort of tattoo on the back of his head. Am I seeing things?
Jen Chaney: Now we're in the category of sound editing and four white guys are standing on stage looking pretty uncomfortable.
You are not seeing things. Jamie Foxx has a tattoo on the back of his neck for a movie role he's doing, if I remember correctly.
"The Incredibles" just won for sound editing.
Wow, not a single woman in that line-up. It seems to be true for a number of the categories. Lotta white people too. Not knocking the nominees themselves, but it seems pretty revealing about the industry.
Jen Chaney: Interesting. Especially in a year when minorities are supposedly being recognized in greater numbers.
I think something else just fell back stage. What is going on back there?
Here come Antonio Banderas and Carlos Santana to sing the song from "Motorcycle Diaries."
Now there is a great movie, "The Incredibles"!!!
Jen Chaney: I liked it, too. Just got the DVD, actually, which I'll be reviewing soon.
Lovely Dupont Circle, Washington, D.C.:
Oh pleeeeeeeease, someone, make Antonio Banderas stop singing! (Shudder)
Jen Chaney: I don't think he sounded so bad, honestly. And Santana sounded good.
At least it was a different kind of number.
I would eagerly fork over all of the money in my pockets if AC/DC were performing this song right now.
Jen Chaney: That would have been sweet. I'd like to see Guns 'N Roses at the Oscars someday, too.
My wife wants to know what and when Josh Groban will be signing ... any idea?
Jen Chaney: He's singing "Believe" from "The Polar Express" with Beyonce (surprise). Will be sometime in the next 20 minutes I'm guessing.
Here's Natalie Portman. Dress is so-so. Not crazy about the headband.
So what's up, Jen, you ducked the question about black comedians bragging about their overdeveloped ... er ... talent.
Jen Chaney: I didn't mean to. I'm editing the questions and trying to answer them while watching the show at the same time. So I may be missing some things.
Ask it again.
Even Chris Rock doesn't like the new format. "Next year they're going to be giving out Oscars in the parking lot," he says.
Someone earlier said that "The Aviator" was working on a sweep. Alan Alda's loss in the Supporting Actor category should've gotten rid of the brooms...
Jen Chaney: It may not be a sweep, but they're clearly doing well.
Travolta's presenting Original Score, boys and girls. And the winner is Jan A.P. Kaczmarek for "Finding Neverland." So that's one for "Peter Pan."
I saw John Travolta at the Sports Club LA here in town a few months ago. He was much shorter than I thought. And much plumper.
Jen Chaney: Really? Interesting.
Did you walk up to him and start singing the Barbarino song? Because that's what I would have done.
I love Chris Rock but he really bombed tonight.
Jen Chaney: What do you all think? I think he's pretty darn funny so far.
Martin Scorsese is on stage talking about the humanitarian award to Roger Mayer.
I give up, what's the Barbarino song?
Jen Chaney: The song Travolta sang as Vinnie Barbarino on "Welcome Back, Kotter." "Ba, ba, ba, ba-ba Barino."
Here's a question: How can you be in both Africa and Chile at the same time? I'm intrigued.
Jen, do you think Natalie Portman can actually act? I haven't seen "Closer" but in everything else I've seen her in, she's appeared to have, shall we say, a "limited range". How come everyone thinks she's so brilliant?
Jen Chaney: She's certainly not good in "Star Wars," but neither are most actors. Did you see her in "Garden State"? I thought she was great in that, more deserving of a nod for that role than the one she played in "Closer."
O.k. Jen, I'll ask again. I was wondering if you think Chris Rock will take the Eddie Murphy route and joke about black men being very well endowed.
Jen Chaney: Cool, thanks for your patience, Lorton.
I'm going to say no. But it's getting later so he might feel like he can get away with more ribald humor, if you will.
Annette Bening is on stage.
Is it me, or are they not introducing the nominated Best Pictures this year? I knew something was missing.
In Memoriam is starting now, with music by Beyonce. (Just kidding, it's Yo-Yo Ma.)
I think Rock has done pretty well. He doesn't appear nervous or anything. Every year I never think the host is hilarious the WHOLE night. You know? They always have a few jokes that bomb. They have to appeal to a wide range of humor. So how they handle the general flow of the show and keeping the audience relaxed are key to being a good host.
Jen Chaney: One positive vote for Rock.
Noticed a pause before applause started for Ronald Reagan. Anyone else notice that?
It's Arica, not Africa. Here in the Andes of northern Chile. A small place with no phones but somehow Internet gets here.
Jen Chaney: Oh my goodness, forgive me. And thanks for being on with us. That is really cool that you're joining us from such a remote location.
Loud cheers for Brando right now.
I LOVE that they remembered T & A filmmaker Russ Meyer ... but why oh why didn't they mention his best efforts, "Faster Pussycat Kill Kill" or "Common Law Cabin"????
Jen Chaney: Don't know. Maybe they couldn't fit "Kill! Kill!" on the screen.
I had read somewhere that Aishwarya Rai (Bride & Prejudice) is suppose to present an award tonight. Any truth to this?
Jen Chaney: Hadn't heard that, Fairfax. Doesn't mean it's not true, though. We're in commercial break.
Nice touch starting off the "death sequence" with Ronald Reagan. No one else in that whole group touched as many lives.
Jen Chaney: Here's one view on Reagan...
San Diego, Calif.:
Gee, I didn't know Ronald Reagan was an actor, too. Just thought he got expensive buildings and airports named after him.
Jen Chaney: And another. We're an equal opportunity chat, folks.
Natalie Portman was better when she was younger. I loved her in "The Professional."
Did they show Katharine Hepburn in the In Memoriam segment? Or did I just miss her?
Jen Chaney: P. Diddy's on stage, and he's introducing Josh Groban and Beyonce.
Hepburn died the year before. I know, it doesn't seem like it but it was indeed a year ago.
Yes, I noticed the Reagan applause pause, too! Surely not loved by many in Hollywood either as an actor or a president.
And I think Chris Rock is doing great.
Jen Chaney: Another vote for Rock. Maybe he should run for President. Oh wait, he already did that in "Head of State."
Following the Oscars formula, there is supposed to be a "surprise" winner a la Marisa Tomei and Jim Broadbent. There hasn't been one yet this evening, any predictions to what that will be? Perhaps a Best Picture to something other than "The Aviator" (given all the awards it has won already, which usually is an early predictor)? By the way, I'm drinking enough red wine for the both of us so I appreciate your sobriety so far in this discussion.
Jen Chaney: You've got red wine? Lucky. I've just got lemon-lime seltzer.
I don't know if there will be a surprise tonight. I think if it comes, it would be in the Best Actress category.
Oh, here comes, Prince. For some reason, it sounded like they were playing the riff from "Carry On My Wayward Son"??
You're very polite, not correcting the continued misspelling.
Jen Chaney: Sometimes misspellings happen by accident because we're moving quickly. Please forgive us the errors.
"Al otro lado del rio" just won for Best Song. And now the composer is singing it. That was his whole speech actually.
Chris Rock is GENIUS. As in member of Mensa. He's saving this show from the boring fate of the Super Bowl. Just imagine if Paul McCartney were presenting.
P.S. PRINCE IS WEARING PINK PANTS. I love him.
Jen Chaney: Who doesn't love Prince?
Sean Penn is on, and we're doing Best Actress. He just stuck up for Jude Law, by the way, taking a pot shot at Rock for busting on him earlier.
I'd like to see Penn and Rock in a fist fight. I think Penn could take him easily.
Sean Penn is a buzzkill.
Jen Chaney: Spicolli a buzzkill? No way, dude! That's gnarly!
For the Best Song award....
Best acceptance speech evuh!
Jen Chaney: That was sweet, wasn't it? Just heard some applause for Winslet ... could there be an upset?
Silver Spring, Md.:
Can we get to some real awards now?
Jen Chaney: Well, we're trying. Hilary Swank just won for "Million Dollar Baby." She thanked Chad Lowe this time. Also said: "I'm just a girl from a trailer park who had a dream." Looked like Eastwood was moved. She'll be gushing about him momentarily, I'm sure.
Now, the cattiness: I kind of like the dress, but the back is Low with a capital L. Oh my, they're trying to play her off.
I was out of the room and missed Sean Penn's defending of Jude. What did he say?
Jen Chaney: He said something to the effect of "Our host asked who Jude Law was. Well, he is one of the finest actors working today." Something like that.
I'll tell you who Jude Law is: One fine-looking man.
OK, why is Michael Ian Black in a Sierra Mist commercial?
College Station, Tex.:
Jorge Delgado was upset because he didn't get to perform his song, "Al Otro Lado del Rio," during the telecast. So he sings it as his acceptance speech!
Jen Chaney: That's one way to take care of it. I think that's why Banderas crossed himself after they announced the winner. He was afraid that guy would kill him after the show.
Lord, did she really come from a trailer park? Does this mean that if I actually ever won an award like this I could say, "I was just a girl from Catholic school with a dream"? Sheesh.
Jen Chaney: She really did come from a trailer park. And yes, you can say that. In fact, I insist.
And when I win, I'll say, "I was just a girl from Montgomery County, Maryland, a suburb near Washington, D.C., with a dream."
Dang! Chris Rock just said "Sean Penn, my accountants would like a word with you."
Don't know what it means but I'm enjoying the feud.
Gwyneth Paltrow is on stage presenting Best Foreign Film.
Sean Penn needs to at least act like he has a sense of humor. How awkward, sticking up for Jude Law. Go get him Rock.
OK, I'm so over Hillary Swank by now. She always does those really long speeches where she thanks her cousin's second cousin's cousin and then refuses to leave when they play the music. Get over yourself.
Jen Chaney: Yeah, yelling her publicist's name was probably not necessary.
Wow. Paltrow is busting out of her dress, no?
Jen Chaney: She's not busting out, I think it's just pinching her.
"The Sea Inside" just won Best Foreign Film.
Is "City of God" going to win for best foreign film? That movie was awesome!!
Jen Chaney: It didn't win, but that's because it was nominated last year. I completely agree, a great film.
I thought the race for Best Actress was tough. That lady from England was good.
Jen Chaney: They were all good. I liked Sandino Moreno a lot, too.
Chris Rock's acountants were those two giant scary looking guys with the briefcases standing around Rock a few minutes ago.
"In MemoriAm" is a buzzkill too.
Jen Chaney: Oh, right. Thanks for the reminder.
Awesome! Charlie Kaufman just won an Oscar for his screenplay for "Eternal Sunshine." He may be the best screenwriter working today, at least in terms of original ideas.
Kate Winslet is a team player and a class act. She is genuinely happy for her coworkers.
Jen Chaney: I like that Kate Winslet, too. She did seem happy for Mr. Kaufman, didn't she?
So what did Annette Benning do, I'm sure the camera was on her ... The last time, when she was pregnant and Hilary won, Annette clapped with "glee"...
Jen Chaney: She had a sort of non-descript look on her face this time. The 'ol frozen smile. Honestly, I think she knew it was going to Hilary so she was probably prepared.
How did they forget Sandra Dee in the Necrology?
Jen Chaney: Did they skip her? Wow, that is an oversight. Maybe they didn't want to re-edit the In Memoriam. Oh boy, here comes Best Actor presented by Charlize Theron in a huge feathery frock.
Get ready for what may be the only interesting acceptance speech of the night.
Who are you wearing tonight?
Jen Chaney: I'm wearing a little number designed especially for me by the exclusive designers at The Limited.
Oh, and a feather boa by Versace.
Sandra Dee just died recently, don't they have to do it within the year, ie 2004?
Jen Chaney: Ossie Davis died in '05, too, though. And he was in there.
Jamie Foxx just won. I'm batting 100. Nice for my record but a bummer that there are no surprises.
How long is the broadcast supposed to be tonight?
Jen Chaney: I'm going to say it will end at midnight. But that's just a guess.
Foxx is starting to talk about his grandmother. He called her his first acting teacher. She said "Act like you got some sense." He's breaking down, oh wait, he regained composure.
That was a really nice close to the speech: "She talks to me in my dreams. And I can't wait to go to sleep tonight because we've got a lot to talk about." He's great at these speeches, man. He's sure had to make enough of them lately.
Baton Rouge, La.:
Jamie Foxx crying about his grandma: Poignant, embarrassing or a mixture of both?
Jen Chaney: I'm going to say poignant because he wasn't blubbering and he handled the whole thing with great class.
Okay. Jamie's speech had me in tears.
Jen Chaney: If I weren't in the office, I would have been crying. I love crying during meaningless awards shows.
Here comes Julia Roberts, looking curvy and busty but good after having her babies.
Here we go, Best Director.
They also forgot the guy who played Dean Wormer in animal house.
"Drunk fat and stupid is no way to go through life son."
Jen Chaney: Yeah, what about Dean Wormer?
Clint Eastwood just won Best Director. They have the decency not to show poor Scorsese, who must be feeling like garbage. The man should have won for "GoodFellas." He was robbed by Kevin Costner.
Now I've finally gotten one wrong, too. So much for my perfect streak.
looks great with those extra pounds. Really. Very curvy.
Jen Chaney: I agree. Curvy's good, and a refreshing change.
Jen: Terrific chat tonight! Wash DC's comment on the chandelier choking Beyonce had me doubled-over with laughter.
It looks like the tide has turned in favor of "Million Dollar Baby."
Jen Chaney: We're at Best Picture. This is ending before midnight, people. I'm in shock. That's the big surprise.
Chris Rock just dropped an f-bomb: Focker. (Dustin Hoffman and Barbra Streisand are on stage.)
WOW. You wanted a surprise, there it is. I would have bet the house and the wine cellar on Scorsese. Payne for "Sideways" would have been better, but this was definitely not anticipated.
Jen Chaney: Really? A lot of people were saying Eastwood so I'm not surprised by that.
And your best picture of the year goes to ... "Million Dollar Baby."
If "The Aviator" loses, it will be a great evening!!! I can forgive the earlier awards if they don't get the big ones!
Jen Chaney: There must be a party at your house then. "The Aviator" has lost, my friend.
Jen, thanks for giving up your Sunday night and Oscar parties to do this chat. It certainly made watching the ceremony more fun. Safe trip home!
Jen Chaney: Home? Oh, surely you jest. I'll be here for several more hours, my friend. I just hope I can leave before the storm hits.
Last year I was here until 5:30 a.m. I was like Apu in that "Simpsons" episode where he works for so many consecutive hours that he think he's a hummingbird of some kind.
Wrapped up at 11:40PM???!!!!
Jen Chaney: I know, I'm truly shocked. You know what? I'm going to keep chatting until midnight just because. The Oscars shouldn't end on the same day the ceremony starts. That's just pure laziness.
What is that "theme music" they keep playing? Sounds like "Lord of the Rings" to me.
Jen Chaney: Sounds like "Lord of the Cheesy Smooth Jazz Songs to Play While the Credits Roll," actually. You know that song. Kenny G wrote it.
Fairfax Station, Va.:
Thanks for a great chat, Jen! So much fun. So funny, too.
Weingarten couldn't have done better.
Jen Chaney: He might have done better. But would he have been as catty about Beyonce's eyeliner? Probably not. I OWN sarcastic eyeliner comments.
What was your favorite moment of the evening, Jen?
Jen Chaney: That brief moment when I actually thought the Terps would beat Carolina.
Oh you mean during the Oscars. That's easy. Jamie Foxx's speech. And Prince's pink pants.
When I watched "Sideways" I almost fell asleep... but aside from that, which of the movies nominated for best movie would you watch for the most pure enjoyment?
Jen Chaney: Really? I loved "Sideways." In fact, that might be the one I'd watch for most pure enjoyment, mainly because "Million Dollar Baby" is a little too wrenching to watch over and over. But a great movie nonetheless.
I think the piece they played over the final credits (and throughout the night) is the soundtrack to "The Terminator," though in a bizarre, Kenny-G like arrangement.
Jen Chaney: You might be right. I've never actually seen "The Terminator," and I'm trying hard to keep it that way.
New York, N.Y.:
All in all, I liked Chris Rock as the host. He didn't say much towards the end, though. And Sean Penn needs to lighten up. I'm sure Jude Law wasn't taking offense at the whole bit at the beginning.
Jen Chaney: He probably wasn't, you're right. Know why? Because men that hot always have a sense of humor about themselves. At least they do in my fantasy land.
Too bad Clint didn't say, "You made my day."
Jen Chaney: Would have been even better if he'd brought out the orangutan from "Every Which Way But Loose." Another thing missing from this year's Oscars: Monkeys.
Is it me or was this one of the rougher production of the Oscars? Loud bangs offstage, the motor noise from the set piece behind the presenters, the guy running offstage behind Chris Rock while coming back from commercial ... Talk about flying by the seat of your pants!
Jen Chaney: Totally, Oakton. I haven't even heard that many crashes during the MTV Movie Awards.
I agree with the early ending. I feel as if they forgot to give an award!
Thanks for the online chat! My husband is not an Oscar watcher, so reading the comments while watching the telecast felt like I wasn't watching it by myself. BTW - Chris Rock'd!!!
Jen Chaney: Glad you liked it. You can't watch the Oscars without making comments to someone, even if it's in an online discussion.
You love monkeys, too!?
Jen Chaney: Doesn't everyone?
Which were your fashion hits? Misses?
Jen Chaney: There weren't any glaring mess-ups. I wasn't crazy about Gwyneth's dress or Sophie Okonedo's. But most people played it pretty safe. As I mentioned earlier, Winslet, Blanchett, Dunst -- they all looked pretty good to me.
I'm taking a few more questions before I sign off...
Do you really think Jude Law is all that hot? He seems so ... small to me. Hobbit small.
Jen Chaney: I can't even continue to talk about Jude Law right now. It will distract me too much from my work.
Also, we're a region on the edge because it's about to start snowing. I know because the man on the news just said so. I had no idea I was on the edge until five minutes ago and now I'm freakin' out!
I love women who love monkeys, artsy women who love monkeys ... that's my dream woman.
Jen Chaney: I love Jude Laws who love monkeys.
I'm STILL bitter that "Eternal Sunshine" didn't get nominated for Best Picture. And I'm on a rampage about "Kill Bill, Vol. 2" failing to garner nominations for Director, Best Actress, and Best Supporting Actor, too.
Jen Chaney: Yeah, I thought "Eternal Sunshine" would have been a better nominee than "Ray." "Kill Bill," while great, probably wasn't quite Oscar material.
How can any song that doesn't make the charts on pop radio, win best song?
I thought Counting Crowes should have won.
Jen Chaney: You raise an interesting point. In the '80s all the song winners were radio hits. Not the case anymore. Most of the time we don't even recognize the songs.
I shouldn't talk about small men. My celebrity crush is Bono.
Jen Chaney: Oh, I love Bono, too. I wrote an entire article about that for The Post, I'm embarrassed to say.
Not a single scary dress to make fun of either. It's true what everyone has been saying -- without people like Cher or Bjork, it's not as fun.
Jen Chaney: Yes. I would have liked to see a swan dress on someone this year.
I've got to close out, everyone. Thanks so, so much for hanging out during the Oscars. Hopefully we'll do it again next year.
Stay on washingtonpost.com while you await the snowstorm; we'll have photo galleries and other fun stuff coming soon.
In the meantime, continue venting about Sean Penn, Jamie Foxx's tears and ugly dresses on our Oscars messageboard. Good night, sweet, million dollar babies.