Sometimes the children are distracted, but, their mother added, at what school are they not?
Later, learning becomes more independent. Matthew, the oldest child still at home, spends much more time on independent reading than in directed class time with his mother. He also watches hour after hour of college-level lectures, recorded on videotape. Matthew said the lectures are as good as the real thing: The professors go slowly and cover material completely. If he's confused, he can always rewind and watch again.
Matthew's father, a manager at a printing company, serves as the school's official principal. He cooks the family dinner most nights, an arrangement that his wife said makes home schooling work.
"Dad does everything a dad's supposed to do," Matthew said. "He reinforces what his kids are learning. He shows them an example of hard work, so they don't grow up lazy."
But Marion Smedberg does most of the teaching. Leaving her next year will be hard, Matthew said, but they both became accustomed to separation while he was at boarding school in New Hampshire. That was hard for his mother, according to Matthew, who was 12 when he first went away.
"I think it was a couple of years before it didn't hurt to let me on the plane to go back," he said.
Now he is considering attending Brigham Young University for its music program. His mother said she is concerned that he would not find Catholic life at BYU fulfilling, but they agree that it's his decision.
Marion Smedberg favors some of the other schools he's considering: Virginia Polytechnic Institute for math, the University of Notre Dame for architecture, Catholic University for philosophy or St. John's College with its Great Books program. Matthew hasn't decided what to study or what to be, but he does maintain a "would be cool" list. It "would be cool" to be an architect. He still thinks it "would be cool" to be a priest.
He is looking for a school where students are not afraid to think deeply and where learning is paramount. He also wouldn't mind high-speed Internet access in dorm rooms and edible food. He's confident that he'll get along with his roommate and make friends quickly. Above all, he's not worried about fitting in.
"I'll never fit in," he said. "Fitting in isn't my ideal. If I did fit in, I would worry that I was giving up part of myself to be like everyone else."
