In Strasburg, A Medium Well Done

"I have three hours of really good astral music I like to play," says Schreiner, as he begins the tour and points to such odd Dixon artifacts as her collection of crucifixes (a devout Catholic, she claimed God gave her the gift of prophecy), a copy of a 45 she recorded ("The Phenomenal Jeane Dixon") and a sweat shirt signed by TV's Golden Girls (the higher-powered ham appeared on the show as herself). "It's really soothing stuff."

Soothing? No. Appropriate for this altogether creepy attraction? You bet your crystal ball.

A 54-year-old former deejay whose so-low voice adds a spine-tingling element to the spooky surroundings, Schreiner agrees with Bernstein that a spectral part of Dixon is still very much alive in Shenandoah Valley.

"We had a psychic come to the museum a while ago," he says, "and when she looked at Ms. Dixon's office desk, she said, 'That thing's red hot!' "

Handling his job with the utmost seriousness, Schreiner maintains that the museum is not meant to convince people of the psychic's mystical powers but simply to provide visitors with enough information to make an educated decision.

"This is the Jeane Dixon story," he says. "Make of it what you will."

However, as he starts rattling off Dixon's dead-on predictions -- not mentioning the horoscope book she wrote for dogs -- Schreiner adds, "You can't write off this stuff as a lot of lucky guesses."

Indeed: Displayed prominently is the May 13, 1956, issue of Parade magazine, which contains an article that reads in part: "As for the 1960 election, Mrs. Dixon thinks it will be dominated by labor and won by a Democrat. But he will be assassinated or die in office, though not necessarily in his first term."

And that astral music suddenly seems so much louder.

The JFK prediction, of course, is the one that made Dixon famous. The one that landed her a syndicated tabloid column. The one that allowed her to hobnob at star-studded galas with such noted followers as astronaut John Glenn, Sen. Strom Thurmond and, uh, Jim Nabors.

Dixon's highest-profile client was former first lady Nancy Reagan, who once felt -- no matter how mercilessly the media dogged her for it -- that no important life decision should be made without Dixon's consultation. It also helped that, in 1962, Dixon told Ronald Reagan that he would one day hold the highest public office in the United States.

"President Reagan wouldn't get on a plane until Dixon told Nancy it was okay," Schreiner says, adding that Nancy Reagan would decide years later that Dixon had somehow lost her powers and would switch to rival psychic Joan Quigley. Dixon, the curator says, was "very upset."

At the museum, Dixon's other headlining prognostications are presented in all their glory: "Nixon Will Be Our Next President!" "Burt and Loni Will Separate!" "We Will Have a Woman President in the 1980s!"

Oh, wait: Scratch that last one. Dixon was good, but she had her share of misfires, including shaky declarations that vaudeville would make a comeback, the Soviets would be first on the moon and, as one of her final visions before her death, Ellen DeGeneres would crash a presidential inauguration and get roughed up by the Secret Service -- which, come to think of it, could still happen.

The museum also details Dixon's childhood growing up in Medford, Wis., the daughter of a lumber tycoon. At age 8, Schreiner says, Dixon was taken to a fortuneteller who predicted that the little girl would one day be a famous seer.

The museum's centerpiece is a re-creation of the bedroom Dixon shared with her husband, James L. Dixon, a real-estate executive in Washington. The boudoir's decor -- think Deepak Chopra meets Siegfried & Roy -- is best summed up by a fellow visitor: "Gosh, Jeane Dixon had really bad taste."

Schreiner continues: "Jeane Dixon also loved to have her portrait painted." And there it is: an entire wall of eye-dizzying Technicolor oil-on-canvas renderings of the woman, including an unsettling painting of the psychic in full clown makeup.

But just as Dixon in Bozo mode is getting to be too much to take, the man responsible for presenting this vast array of metaphysical memorabilia shows up in his museum.

"Why did I do this?" Bernstein shouts. "I don't know! I can't explain it! We were good friends! Just friends!"

ESCAPE KEYS

GETTING THERE: The Jeane Dixon Museum and Library is 81 miles southwest of Washington. Take Route 66 west to I-81, then to Route 11 south (Exit 298 toward Strasburg). Tune your sixth sense to Dixon's eerie presence two miles down Route 11, coming from a long building on your left that also houses the Great Strasburg Emporium, an antiques-lover's dream.

DETAILS: The Dixon museum is open Friday through Monday, 10 a.m. to 2 p.m., or at other times by appointment (540-465-5884). Admission is $8, but ask about the combo deal that allows you to also visit the affiliated Stonewall Jackson Museum (540-465-5884), the Museum of American Presidents (540-465-5999) and Dixon's favorite spiritual hangout, Crystal Caverns (540-465-5884). The Web site for all these museums, including the Dixon Museum, is www.waysideofva.com.

STAYING: Rooms at Dixon's preferred nearby lodging, the Wayside Inn (540-869-1797, www.waysideofva.com), start at $79. The spooky halls of the inn, built in 1797 and located on Route 11 two miles north of the Dixon museum, might be tight and creaky, but the rooms are surprisingly spacious with all of the modern amenities -- and maybe a few ghosts, as well.

EATING: The candlelit dining room at the Wayside offers the best food in the area. Entrees range from the "famous" smothered chicken ($10.95) to the "famous" crab cakes ($22.95). Make sure to order a cup of the Colonial peanut soup, a rib-sticking concoction that will split the table between love and hate. For lunch, try a stuffed bagel sandwich at the Hotel Strasburg (888-763-8327).

INFO: Strasburg Chamber of Commerce, 540-465-3187, www.strasburgva.com.