"Whoever you are who broke my gate. If I had found you on my land I would have cut you up like the dirty snake you are."
Drive by the house if you're there; just don't go knocking unless she's outside and invites you in. Better yet, see her work at the National Cultural Foundation on Seven Mile Beach.
High End
The
Westin Casuarina offers everything you'd expect from a top resort, down to the manicured grounds around pools with swim-up bars.
We learn upon check-in that the hotel's Casa Havana is the only four-diamond restaurant on the island. We walk a shaded path lined with carefully tended tropical flowers. Since our splurge is now the hotel itself, we'll be going across the street for dinner, to Chicken! Chicken! (It's a Boston Market of a different name.) We take out our dinner to enjoy it on our third-floor balcony, overlooking the broad white beach and turquoise water.
One way to appreciate a trip is to stay in a place better than your own home, and this resort certainly fits that definition. As we stroll the beach the next day, we come upon other lovely self-contained resorts. The Marriott Beach Resort, in particular, seems like it could deliver on its promise to "transport you into a lush paradise, adorned by fragrant flora and colorful fauna . . ."
We've no reason to look for a better beach while here, because this is the best. We can no longer afford the boating trips offered on our beach, but we don't need them. We can swim to a good snorkeling spot next door to the Westin, at a public beach in front of the residence of the governor, appointed by Her Majesty the Queen.
It's easy to just laze around, without a care in the world, and pretend this is your life. What's not to like?
But as I put on my resort wear so as not to feel too trashy walking through the Westin lobby, I kind of wish I could just walk out in my bare feet to the terrace of the Cobalt Coast, or the breezeway of the Turtle Nest Inn, or even the concrete porch of the Harbour View.
Besides, I don't think that the owner of the Westin will ever offer to let me run the place should he need a vacation, no matter how often I come back. And he sure as heck won't be giving me a goodbye hug.
Cindy Loose will be online to discuss this story at 2 p.m. Monday during the Travel section's regular weekly chat.
Details: Cayman Islands
GETTING THERE: Most major U.S. carriers offer connecting flights to the Caymans from BWI, Reagan National and Dulles. A Web site check shows some amazing deals in December, from as low as $368 round trip. For November travel, American is offering round-trip air from Dulles to Grand Cayman for about $390.
WHERE TO STAY:
HIGH END: It's easy to pick top-drawer accommodations -- you can hardly go wrong along Seven Mile Beach. One of the best beaches is at the Westin Casuarina Resort and Spa (800-WESTIN-1, www.westin.com), a luxury property where rooms range from $249 to $550 per night.
MIDDLE RANGE: At Treasure Island Resort (800-203-0775, www.treasureislandresort.net), on Seven Mile Beach, rooms start at $155 off-season and increase to $220 in winter. A recent Web sale listed rooms for $115. Rooms have tile floors, air conditioning, cable TV and patios or balconies.
Sunset House (800-854-4767, www.sunsethouse.com) is a very modest low-rise on the sea, about a mile from Seven Mile Beach, without a sandy beach. It's a favorite among divers. Rooms range from $125 to $250.
Cobalt Coast Resort and Suites (866- 622-9626, www.cobaltcoast.com) is a two-story resort, simple yet elegant, with modern rooms. Rates range from $160 to $240, with one- and two-bedroom suites from $250 to $425.
BUDGET: Turtle Nest Inn (166 Bodden Town Rd., 345-947-8665, www.turtlenestinn.com) is not quite as luxurious as it looks on its Web site, but it's close, and it's a great buy if you don't need to be near the action. Rooms are furnished with wicker and have patios. Rates range from $89 to $129, apartments from $119 to $199.
The Harbour View (345-949-5681, www.cayman.com.ky/com/harview) offers budget rooms or apartments on the water and is a short walk from Seven Mile Beach. Rooms are small and a bit dark but clean, and the bathrooms are modern. Rates start at $75, apartments $99 to $149.
WHERE TO EAT: The Westin's Casa Havana, the only four-diamond restaurant in the Caymans, offers a diverse, international menu in a plantation-style setting. Entrees range from $28 to $44. The Lighthouse at Breakers, a half-hour drive from downtown, serves seafood and pasta in a beautiful waterfront setting. Entrees range from about $20 to $48. The Wharf, a gourmet waterfront restaurant with meat and seafood, is at the tip of Seven Mile Beach; entrees begin at $22.
The Champion House (43 Eastern Ave.) is in a somewhat downtrodden section of George Town, but locals laud it as the best Caribbean food on the island. Entrees range from $8 to $30, with most about $15. The Cracked Conch, just past the Turtle Farm, is a charming, laid-back waterfront restaurant with a broad menu focused on seafood. Entrees start at $17, most around $25.
Lorna's Jerk Shop, at a bend in the road in Pease Bay (near the Turtle Nest Inn but on the other side of the street), serves awesome grilled pork, chicken and fish stuffed with cabbage, with side dishes, for less than $10, including a soda and a seat at an outdoor picnic table. Open evenings, Wednesday to Saturday, and as late as 2:30 a.m. on weekends.
WHAT TO DO: Contact the tourism department (see below) for information on all manner of water sports, including submarine dives, as well as golfing, horseback riding and aerial tours.
Rum Point, at the tip of Grand Cayman, has the best sunsets on the island. A public park there has hammocks, a beach bar, restaurant and dock for boating tours. You can drive or take a 45-minute ferry ($15 round trip) from the Hyatt Regency dock.
The QEII Botanic Park (345-947-9462; admission about $7.35) features 40 acres of gardens, a lake and rare blue iguanas. For information on the Turtle Farm and its self-guided tours: 345-949-3893, www.turtle.ky; admission $6.
The National Cultural Foundation (17 Harquail, on Seven Mile Beach across from the World Gym, 345-949-5477, www.artscayman.org) has a collection of Miss Lassie's work. Reservations are required for a free tour.
INFORMATION: Cayman Islands Department of Tourism, 800-346-3313, www.caymanislands.ky.
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