Remakes: Rev 'Em Up!

In life, when you say "been there, done that," it usually means: That's why I'm not doing it again. But in Hollywood that's the starting point for a remake starring Nicole Kidman. Or Johnny Depp. Or Billy Bob Thornton. Or . . .

Recycling as creativity -- it's long been the modus operandi in La-La Land. TV shows, previous movies -- the whole pop cultural detritus of yesteryear -- they've been the collective grist for a thousand green lights. There's good reason behind this. It's called free advertising. There's an instant familiarity factor for everyone. If you remake "Herbie" or "The Pink Panther" or "Bewitched," you don't have to waste money selling the project. People know instantly what they're going to get.

"Bewitched" the movie? Cool!

But this summer, it seems, Hollywood isn't just redoing old shows and movies. It's retrofitting them with turbo drive and rocket thrusters. The characters are tougher. The villains are scarier. And the revised scenario takes everything to a bigger, louder, faster, darker, weirder, or whatever-er, place. We're talking power adjustment.

In the case of "Herbie: Fully Loaded," we might not just be talking metaphorically. From the looks of the previews and advance publicity material, this Herbie looks like one killer, NASCAR-ready racing car. How close it will be to the cute old Love Bug of the 1968 Disney flick and all its sequels remains to be seen. And if the aliens in the 1953 film "The War of the Worlds" scared you or, for that matter, the aliens in the 1938 radio play on which the first film was based, imagine what Steven Spielberg's going to make of them in this year's version starring Tom Cruise. You saw what he did with sharks and dinosaurs.

"Bewitched" isn't going to be the original 1964-72 TV show all over again. It's about an actor (Will Ferrell) who has been hired to star in a remake of the TV show, who hires an actress (Kidman) who he hopes won't upstage him. But she turns out to be a real witch. And of course, this witch is capable of stupendous, even scary, magic. And "The Dukes of Hazzard," that goofy good ol' boy series that aired for seven seasons from the late '70s into the mid-'80s, is going to have more muscle and -- how to put this? -- automotive impact. Those punches in bar fights are going to really hurt. It's hard to imagine how the original Duke family -- Bo and Luke, cousin Daisy and Uncle Jesse -- would feel about this brawny new world.

You can be sure that the makers of "The Longest Yard," a do-over of the 1974 Burt Reynolds prison/football flick, aren't going to take the idea of tough guys playing football lightly. That's no doubt why you'll see some tough guys of NFL or WWE fame getting roles and busting heads, including former Dallas Cowboy Michael Irvin and wrestler Stone Cold Steve Austin.

Remember the old "Honeymooners," that delightful series about Ralph Kramden and Ed Norton, starring the inimitable Jackie Gleason and Art Carney? The inimitable are going to be imitated. Cue Cedric the Entertainer and Mike Epps to "do" Ralph and Ed. Sure, it's a fascinating idea to reimagine the characters as African Americans. But what about Gleason's majestic bumbling and legendary timing, or Carney's silent-movie grace? How do you remake that? You don't. You do different -- way different.

In "Batman Begins," the caped crusader becomes Batman after a trip to the Himalayas as Bruce Wayne, where he learns some martial arts. Then he comes back to face a particularly dark adversary: Ra's Al Ghul, aka the Demon's Head, who has been alive since the Middle Ages. Yes, he was a character from a Batman comic in the 1970s, but clearly he's darker and scarier than your basic Riddler or Joker.

In "Charlie and the Chocolate Factory," Depp's Willy Wonka won't be as lovable as Gene Wilder's. He'll be a little creepier, darker. What do you expect, with Tim Burton directing? (In this case, it could be argued that this thematic bleakness is closer to the original spirit of the Roald Dahl book. But it's definitely the equivalent of a power-up from the Wilder film.)

The result of all these endeavors is more than a little ironic: These new "versions" do little more than share the character names and the title with their original source. This is the new creativity. It doesn't necessarily mean the new movie is going to be bad. "The Dukes of Hazzard," after all, stars the lively Seann William Scott and Johnny Knoxville as Bo and Luke, and Jessica Simpson as Daisy. And in some cases, a darker movie might make purists happier. Should the "Bad News Bears" remake, starring Thornton, be badder than the 1976 original? Or should they just make a brand-new movie (whoa, crazy concept) about unruly baseball kids? It seems to boil down to this: Do you make a new version of a beloved favorite with power or reverence? Turn the page for a thumbnail guide to these and other movies. And let your multiplex adventures begin.

When it comes to release dates for summer movies, the only constancy is change. For the latest information, including trailers of upcoming films, visit http://www.washingtonpost.com/summermovies.

FRIDAY

ANOTHER ROAD HOME -- See capsule review on Page 35.

IT'S ALL GONE PETE TONG -- See capsule review on Page 35.

KICKING & SCREAMING -- See review on Page 34.

KONTROLL -- See capsule review on Page 35.

MINDHUNTERS -- See review on Page 33.

MONDOVINO -- See capsule review on Page 35.

MONSTER-IN-LAW -- See review on Page 33.

UNLEASHED -- See review on Page 34.

THURSDAY

STAR WARS: EPISODE III -- REVENGE OF THE SITH

Who's Who: Ewan McGregor, Hayden Christensen, Natalie Portman, Ian McDiarmid, Samuel L. Jackson. George Lucas, supreme creator of the "Star Wars" franchise, directs.

What's What: This is the movie about Darth Vader's emergence. Anakin (Christensen), a young Jedi knight fighting with Obi-Wan Kenobi (McGregor) in the Clone Wars, is lured to the dark side by Supreme Chancellor Palpatine (McDiarmid), who is really the evil Darth Sidious. Anakin is unaware that his own wife, Padme (Portman), is pregnant.

MAY 20

MAD HOT BALLROOM

Who's Who: Preteen schoolchildren and aspiring ballroom dancers in New York. Marilyn Agrelo directs.

What's What: This documentary follows a group of 11-year-old kids as they train and participate in a citywide ballroom dance competition. Along the way, they reveal themselves and their world, and they change from reluctant participants to determined competitors.

3-IRON (BIN-JIP)

Who's Who: Hee Jae, Seung-yeon Lee, Se-jin Park, Hyuk-ho Kwon. Kim Ki-duk ("Spring, Summer, Fall, Winter . . . and Spring") directs.

What's What: A young man, Tae-suk (Jae), squats in strangers' deserted houses but earns his keep by fixing up and cleaning the places he secretly lives in. His life changes when he runs into a woman (Lee) still living in her house.

MAY 27

THE HOLY GIRL

Who's Who: Maria Alche, Carlos Belloso, Mercedes Moran, Julieta Zylberberg. Argentine filmmaker Lucrecia ("La Cienaga") Martel writes and directs.

What's What: A girl (Alche) whose religious studies are coinciding with her own physical maturation meets a sexually perverted man (Belloso) and decides to try to save him.

LADIES IN LAVENDER

Who's Who: Judi Dench, Maggie Smith, Daniel Bruehl, Freddie Jones, Miriam Margolyes, Natascha McElhone. Veteran actor Charles Dance directs.

What's What: During World War II, Andrea (Bruehl), an injured young man, washes ashore off the coast of Cornwall. Two British sisters (Dench and Smith) take him in and help him recover, not realizing the impact he's to have on their lives.

LAYER CAKE

Who's Who: Daniel Craig, Michael Gambon, Colm Meaney, Kenneth Cranham, Jamie Foreman, Sally Hawkins. A directorial debut for Matthew Vaughn, who produced "Lock, Stock and Two Smoking Barrels" and "Snatch."

What's What: A cocaine dealer (Craig) wants out of his profession, but his planned retirement is stymied when crime lord Jimmy Price (Cranham) forces him to locate the missing daughter of businessman and friend Eddie (Gambon).

THE LONGEST YARD

Who's Who: Adam Sandler, Chris Rock, Burt Reynolds, James Cromwell, Michael Irvin, Nelly. Peter ("50 First Dates") Segal directs.

What's What: In this remake of the 1974 movie (starring Reynolds), former pro quarterback Paul Crewe (Sandler), who's now doing time in jail, is asked to assemble a football team to take on the prison guards. He enlists the help of Nate (Reynolds), a onetime player and coach. They soon discover the game they're about to play is being fixed.

MADAGASCAR

Who's Who: Voices of Ben Stiller, Chris Rock, David Schwimmer, Jada Pinkett Smith, Cedric the Entertainer. Eric Darnell (co-director of "Antz") and Tom McGrath direct.

What's What: In this computer-animated feature, Alex the lion (Stiller), Marty the zebra (Rock), Melman the giraffe (Schwimmer) and Gloria the hippo (Pinkett Smith) escape from the Central Park Zoo to live in Africa. But a mishap at sea leads them to Madagascar, where the domesticated animals are ill equipped to deal with wild animals.

JUNE 1