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The Whizzinator: A House Panel's No. 1 Priority

Rep. Bart Stupak (D-Mich.) bemoans the Whizzinator while holding an advertisement for the device. At left is Ed Whitfield (R-Ky.), the subcommittee chairman.
Rep. Bart Stupak (D-Mich.) bemoans the Whizzinator while holding an advertisement for the device. At left is Ed Whitfield (R-Ky.), the subcommittee chairman. (By Robert A. Reeder -- The Washington Post)
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Still, no one is revering these men as industrial visionaries. Rep. Greg Walden (R-Ore.) calls them "jokers" and asks one how they can sleep at night.

In response to questions from reporters, Catalano merely strokes his long gray beard and presses down on his lips with two fingers. How has the airport incident been for business?

"He will not be saying anything," says Barry Boss, Catalano's attorney. At one point, Catalano, who is wearing a white sport jacket over a Hawaiian shirt, emits strained squeaks, and one reporter asks if he is actually capable of speaking.

"Yes," Catalano whispers, now pulling on his beard.

Catalano takes his seat when Rep. Ed Whitfield (R-Ky.), chairman of the oversight and investigations subcommittee of the Energy and Commerce Committee, calls the hearing back to order. After a videotaped appearance by a prison inmate who testifies about the ease with which he could evade drug tests, Catalano and his fellow barons move to the front of the hearing room. They rise, in tandem, raise their right hands and take their oaths. Whitfield asks Catalano a question about the potential legitimate uses of the Whizzinator.

"On the advice of my attorney," Catalano says quietly, "I respectfully decline to answer under my Fifth Amendment right."

Whitfield dismisses Mr. Whizzinator, who bolts from the hearing room, grinning. He arrived in Washington this morning, on the red-eye from California, and is now headed back to the airport. No, he says in response to a question, he did not get to enjoy the spring day, see any sights or take in the monuments.

"But I've seen one of the greatest monuments of all," Catalano says, now fully animated. "I've sat before one of the greatest bodies in the world." With that, the originator of the Whizzinator marches toward a waiting car and into history.


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