UPN to NBC: We Will Rock You

So is "America's Next Top Model," Wednesdays at 8, but its lead-out, "Kevin Hill," starring Taye Diggs is not, which is going to make a lot of women very sad.

"Veronica Mars," which struggled on Tuesday nights this season, has been given that hour -- the best slot on UPN's schedule.

"America's Next Top Model" reruns won't continue to air on Friday nights; you'll have to wait until the following Tuesday to catch up. After which, you can watch UPN's new drama "Sex, Lies & Secrets," which is set in Los Angeles and is about sex, lies and secrets.

Not only did Fox suits not cancel the barely watched "Arrested Development, " but this fall the network will kick off its prime-time lineup with it Mondays at 8. It is one of a whopping 11 sitcoms on the network's new schedule.

Fox will start four nights -- Monday, Wednesday, Friday and Sunday -- with two comedies each. The network will have more comedies than NBC and CBS combined.

The trade papers credit Fox with having 12 comedies on its new schedule, but they're counting the one-hour series "Head Cases," which will air Wednesdays after "That '70s Show" and "Stacked." "Head Cases" stars Chris O'Donnell as a hotshot attorney who has a nervous breakdown, spends three months in a "rest home," then is assigned as his outpatient "buddy" a twitchy low-rent lawyer played by Adam Goldberg.

If you count that as a comedy, then you have to count ABC's "Desperate Housewives" and CBS's new "Ghost Whisperer," except that one's unintentionally funny thanks to Jennifer Love Hewitt, who stars as a woman who talks to dead people.

Anyway, during its upfront presentation Thursday afternoon, Fox called "Head Cases" a "dramedy." We prefer to call it a "coma."

So, Fox is kicking off Monday with "Arrested Development," followed by a new sitcom "Kitchen Confidential," which is about a formerly hot chef given a second chance after rehab. It's from Darren Star of "Sex and the City" fame.

Also bound for Monday, a new drama called "Prison Break," about an engineer who robs a bank so that he can get into prison with the floor plan to break out his brother, who's on death row for a murder he did not commit. Apparently hiring a good lawyer was not an option.

"House" is back, Tuesday at 9. Preceding it is a new drama, "Bones," inspired by real-life forensic anthropologist and novelist Kathy Reichs.

"The O.C." is back on Thursday, followed by new drama "Reunion," which is a mystery that reverses the "24" formula. Instead of 24 episodes, each of which covers one hour of the same day, in "Reunion," 20 episodes will span two decades in the life of the ensemble cast, with each episode encompassing one year. Pretty clever.

Friday nights "Bernie Mac" and "Malcolm in the Middle" return, followed by new drama "The Gate," about specialists solving extremely kinky murders in San Francisco -- think "CSI" sweeps episode every single week. Whoohoo!

Fox's Saturday lineup will never change: "Cops," "Cops" and "America's Most Wanted." And just one new comedy is being added to its Sunday night, "The War at Home," about two parents and their teenage kids.